I work in a Non-Govt Organization in India. I am married and blessed with a beautiful wife by my side.
I like to write articles and "Words" are my toys... I love playing with "Toys" I mean "Words". :P
I had started a movement against human trafficking through a page called, 'Stop Human Trafficking' and wish all to join with me to create awareness against this social evil.
I am a Motivational Counselor and am good at building self esteem. I love to help others those who are in need of a friend, a brother, a guide...
Despite of everything that I had achieved in my life, I still prefers to be 'A Learner' through out my life.
People are more likely to tell you that blue is their favorite color than any other shade. That makes it a safe choice. Seeing blue also brings thoughts of trustworthiness to mind; always a good thing. – Psychology Today
Blue is the most stable color. Women love seeing stable men. It is also calming and can help relax both you and your date’s nerves. – Science of People
Blue is the colour of the mind and is essentially soothing; it affects us mentally, rather than the physical reaction we have to red. Strong blues will stimulate clear thought and lighter, soft blues will calm the mind and aid concentration. Consequently it is serene and mentally calming. It is the colour of clear communication. Blue objects do not appear to be as close to us as red ones. Time and again in research, blue is the world’s favourite colour. – Colour Affects
One of the world’s favourite colours, blue is called the colour of the mind and is described as soothing, tranquil, serene and orderly. Blue is said to boost productivity and is therefore often used to paint office walls. To project an image of security, advertisement companies often use blue while marketing their products. – The Daily Star
I did a research on the effects of colour BLUE in the human psyche. And I was right about it. That is why whenever I look at the blue ceiling up there over my head, I feel a soothing sense of composure transcending into me and calming down the storms raised in my heart slowly. Its encompassing nature creates a sense of security in my heart and mind. Its unending horizon gives a sense of freedom and privilege. Its soft blue colour has such serenity that fills my heart and mind with peacefulness.
I have a fascination for the Blue Wide Sky. And whenever I get an opportunity I capture the beautiful sky as soon as possible without thinking twice. People around me usually make fun of me saying, “what you are capturing… you will get many more opportunities like this“. But they don’t understand that the beauty of sky for that particular moment is unique and might not be available for me later.
Whenever I feel alone I look at the sky and instantly I get connected with it. The sky reminds me of God’s unlimited promises, His amazing compassion and His unfailing love. It fills my heart in gratitude and praises for Him who has been always faithful to me despite of my iniquities and follies. The sky also reminds me of His forgiveness as the serenity and width of it explains as such. The sky also reminds me of Him and His personality – He is so big, almighty, powerful and so amazingly beautiful. Only a beautiful God can create such beautiful and humongous sky.
I have few photographs that I had captured long back. You can enjoy the slideshow those as under:
To conclude I would like to quote few scripture portions about the sky:
God called the vault “sky.” And there was evening, and there was morning—the second day.
He stretches out the north over empty space; He hangs the earth on nothing.
The heavens declare the glory of God; the skies proclaim the work of his hands.
Sanika was looking at him intently as if she is concentrating on something very seriously. Her heartbeats were rapid. She was feeling extremely vulnerable. ‘Oh, how much she needs someone to hold her tight and give her strength.‘ She thought closing her eyes as her mind took her back to those years when both of them were romancing. The first time when he proposed her and wanted to kiss her lips… she was excited and was literally shivering yet she allowed Pranay to kiss her lips, and he made her stable and calm. That feeling was so beautiful…
‘Arrrggghhhh… what is she thinking…?‘ She opened her eyes wide and looked at the man who dumped her years back and now came with a bouquet of flowers, hoping her to go back to his arms again. ‘I need strength, oh God… I need strength to counter my own emotions…help me… help me please…‘ She mumbled a quick prayer.
“What are you looking at? Are you lost in thoughts and remembering the glorious days that we had long back?” Pranay asked enthusiastically. Sanika could not respond to him immediately. She lied when she shook her head. She did think about their past – ‘oh yeah, so called glorious past‘. And then her phone beeped. It was a text from Atul.
Pranay was restless as she looked into her phone and started to read the message:
“Sani, I am sorry, I was a bit upset with you a day ago. I screamed at you. But I think it’s okay to have memories and we must live with them but we must ensure that these memories don’t spoil our present and future. I trust you fully and I KNOW you haven’t cheated on me. I just want you to do one thing when you meet him and talk to him today. Yeah, I want you to face him eye to eye. Have a heart to heart talk. That is the only way to overcome your guilt and fear that I could very well feel even when I am here so far away from you. I trust the love between us and I am confident that there is nothing in this world that can keep you away from me. Just go and face him Sani. I wish you the best and trust you can do it without being vulnerable. I will be waiting to hear from you.”
“Bingo!!!” Sanika said in her heart as she immediately felt a calmness encompassing her whole being and she didn’t feel vulnerable anymore in this foolish man’s presence. But when she looked at his over ambitious face she started laughing hysterically. Even the flower bouquet fell down on the floor from her lap as she was in a fits of laughter. Tears came into her eyes laughing. She looked at his surprised and bewildered face which made her laugh all the more…. She felt pity on him and felt she is ready now to face him.
“Ar..are you alright Sani?” Pranay asked feeling little weird.
“Absolutely I am… I was so desperate to meet you for the moment like this Pranay and it’s so fun meeting you finally…” Her surprising statement made Pranay startled though her laugh irked him a bit.
“Now stop that laugh for some time and tell me why you wanted to meet me and who’s text were you reading? Was it a joke that someone sent to you? Are you seriously desperate to meet me… Your Pranoy?” Pranay again weaved flowery dreams in his mind as he asked excitedly.
Sanika calmed herself down and replied firmly “It was a text from Mr. Trihan… Mr. Atul Trihan, the husband of Mrs. Sanika Trihan… not SANI for your kind information… Actually he wished me the best to meet with you Mr. Pranay whatever.“
Pranay was choked hearing those words. He was fancying Sanika was the same old girl, soft as clay on whom he can engrave whatever he wants to… He felt a fear for the first time facing this woman – Mrs. Sanika Trihan. He feebly asked, “What did he wished you so?“
“He wanted me to face the dreamer for good and close the chapter with him forever…” She said taunting him and continued speaking without allowing him to utter even a single word.
“I wanted to to meet you, face to face to overcome my guilt, my fear! Ever since you dumped me, I feared of any relationship. I feared that I will never be loved. This fear was so deep that in spite of meeting a person who loves me and respects me to the core, I feared that someday he will dump me. We got married later on. Fear started taking a back seat and guilt started taking over. I was guilty that in spite of having a husband who is just so perfect, I would still secretly think about you often, in ways like, its Pranay’s birthday, oh, this is Pranay’s favourite colour, Pranay’s favourite dish and what not. After few years, we were blessed with a baby boy. Life was beautiful again. But I would often think about how the things would have been if you had not dumped me. You had made such a deep impact on me. I feared all my life until now that someday, this impact will show up and will spoil my marriage. I was groped by fear and guilt at the same time. To add to the turmoil, I happened to meet you here. Although I ran away from facing you, I was very very disturbed by this meeting. It brought back all the memories I tried forgetting all these years. I couldn’t take this burden for long. And I gathered some courage and planned to face you today! If I am able to walk away from you today, there will be no looking back. I shall be free of guilt of having you on my mind and also from the fear of you spoiling my present relationship. Atul, let me say – My Atul taught me how to stand on my own feet being standing by me all the time and now standing for me even when he is so far away from me… I think you should learn from him the quality of respecting a woman and standing beside her… I pity Tanu who’s husband is a coward and isn’t standing beside her.”
Sanika saw Pranay’s pale face and lowered head. She got up from her chair and walked upto him. She placed her hand on his shoulder and said politely, “Pranay, grow up. You probably never learned anything about Tanu till now. Try to learn about her in a newer way. Though that’s upto you. I have nothing to say about it but I am done with you forever. You won’t be even in my wildest thoughts also now on and I am so happy about it that I could bring a closure to this chapter. Now get up, take this flowers and go away from here.”
Sanika never even allowed Pranay to respond a bit even as she went to the door and opened it for him to leave right then. He didn’t have anything to say. He was looking lost and pale. He got up, gathered the flower and left without uttering a word or looking at Sanika even once.
Sanika closed the door taking a deep breath of relief and jumped on her bed giggling away as she saw Atul’s name flashing on the screen.
“Hey baby, my love… What a timing! Were you watching us?” Sanika joked.
“Yeah, I was actually… couldn’t know about him but could feel your heart stable and connected with me. Could you do it my love? Is he gone?” Atul asked desperately as his heart was racing.
Sanika expressed her joy replying excitedly, “Yeesssssss… I did it and he is gone forever, from here and from everywhere.“
God is not human, that he should lie, not a human being, that he should change his mind. Does he speak and then not act? Does he promise and not fulfill?
Wow! Candles Online completed 3 years today.
This journey actually started long back in the year 2006 which you can find in the ABOUT page. And the journey came to a standstill in 2014. 2014 was a year when I saw my child ‘Candles’ succumbing to death because of many different constraints that had been troubling me from all around. It was a very disturbing year in regards to my passion and vision. But 2015 was a year when God prompted in my heart to revive my dead child in a newer way. And I praise God, that I could revive my child with the help of 6 valiant warriors who joined hands with me in the same. These 6 valiant warriors were Anupam, Sulagna, Avishikta, Khristina, Rajnandini and Prabhjot.
11th July 2015 my child ‘Candles’ was reborn as ‘Candles Online’ on a Web Platform. My joy was by leap and bounds and was uncontrollable. And we seven were excited and were happy about what we were doing. We discussed, shared our ideas, helped each other and wrote numerous articles together. I wrote a lot of articles then as we were very less in number and my team members were a bit busier than me. But we did give a kick start to this initiative in a very good way.
After few months when Avinash, Aastha and Kalpana joined, I became greedy. 😛 I started searching for more writers and I did get some awesome writers. Prabhjot fired the bullets at Kuljeet & Preeta her sisters, keeping the gun on my shoulder and they joined as well. Pradita came in and Candles Online became very heavy and well decorated with multi-talented writers.
This journey was not an easy one. Those who were with me from the beginning, like Rajnandiniand Prabhjot were aware of those struggles to some extent. Sometimes I was scolded for this initiation. I was told it’s a wrong vision. I was mocked at. Some could not commit time for it, some rejected it, some were arrogant about it, some were rude with me, some left it.
Yet, those who grasped it, wrote for it though I understand some of my team members are extremely busy with their professional life but they had never disown me or Candles Online. Some of their passion for Candles encourage me so much. Few days ago someone almost screamed at me for not paying proper attention to Candles Online and I am proud of that person. Couple of days ago we came up with 18 old and new topics together. And I was enthralled by the passion of my team members. Because for that passion to change and to be a change agent we stepped into this boat called Candles Online.
I praise God for His faithfulness envisioning me and helping us to carry this mantel to lit the fire in everyone’s heart and bring the true joy and transformation in their lives through His divine intervention.
On this auspicious occasion few of my family members have shared their hearts as well.
Saakshi: A lone candle lit was enough to vanquish the darkness from our hearts and now it’s been three incredible years and the light just gets brighter, stronger, mightier.
Sriram: It’s a platform where we express ourselves and our thoughts and we let our own lights shine, in best hope, that our experiences or views will be a shining beacon to those who read and can relate or learn.
Rajnandini: From multifarious topics addressed on paperprints years before, to completing three remarkable years in the web world, CANDLESONLINE has come a long way in reaching far and wide in realising it’s vision and mission to touch lives and rekindle the spirits of people.
Kuljeet: Candles Online is 3 years old.. Many many congratulations.. Under the able guidance of Chiradeep we have published at least one article every day.. No mean feat.. I joined this creative journey one year ago and loved every moment of it… Kudos to the creative, hardworking and beautiful family of Candles Online…
Ashrita: Congratulations to all the team who help the community learn new things each day for the last 3 years!
Peter: A great team of people who bring hope and encouragement to others through their honest and sincere experiences shared in their well-crafted, thoughtful articles, always leaving behind a nugget of wisdom.
Prabhjot: In last 3 years, this platform has helped me build an amazing relationship with my readers and co-writers and in this journey, I have grown multiple folds. Thanks to this community.
And at the end Preeta nailed it by saying: Keep burning and enlighten everyone. Cheers! May we grow, grow and grow.
Sanika was not in a very good mood. She was anyway feeling very sick because of the bad hangover she was going through and above it Pranay’s very sight disturbed her completely. It was all because of him she went on to gulp so much of alcohol last night and there she was stumbling upon him again and again till now. And to her utter dismay she heard Pranay again at her door.
“What are you doing here again? Why are you not just disappearing from my sight?”, Sanika was frustrated and angry.
“I understand your state of mind Sanika but you are crossing your limits now. Your husband called and I picked up by mistake thinking it as mine but it was your phone which you left it. I just came to give it back to you. Talk to your husband.” Pranay retorted as his male ego was hurt. He handed over the phone to her and walked away from that place.
“What? This man spoke to Atul again? Oh God!”, Sanika thought as she held her head with both her hands.
She quickly dialled Atul’s number waiting for his response. She knew how particular Atul was and how he didn’t like things out of the place. She was ready for a mouthful from him and she was okay with it. She loved it when Atul corrected her because she knew that he did it out of his sheer love and concern for her.
“Hello… who’s it now? Pranay or Sanika?” Sanika was really taken aback when Atul asked this in a very grave voice.
“Why are you asking like that Atul? You know I was not well and that man interfered and spoke to you…why are you so rude to me?”, Sanika was instantly hurt deeply. She was already very broken because of the very sight of her past life. Her emotions were surging out. She was vulnerable and needed much care and affection from a person who had been so understanding and caring for last 9 years. But now he asked something so rudely that she was unable to take it.
“Because till now I am unable to understand what is going on there in that bloody Switzerland?” Atul again shot a bullet that pierced Sanika’s heart.
“Atul, you are hurting me darling instead of gathering my broken pieces in your palms as you always do”, Sanika started sobbing as she said that.
“Now, that’s the best weapon which you all females have… WEEPING… Huh… Now will you stop shedding your tears and explain what is going on with you from beginning till now. Do you even remember about your kids? Do you remember their names? You didn’t ask about them for last two days…” Atul continued his attacks on Sanika which she could not take anymore.
She wept as she continued speaking with broken words…“Listen then you insensitive man…” She paused and started again wiping her tears.
“I saw Pranay two days ago in the market. It took some time to click who the familiar-seeming face was. As it dawned on me that it was him, I walked away from that place immediately cursing my fate to have met him again in my life. And guess what?” She paused again.
“What?” Atul asked eagerly.
“I saw him speaking again on the podium in our office conference as a guest speaker. Can you believe that? Every time I avoided his sight he kept on looking at me making me uncomfortable I excused myself and went away from that place. But I could not take it. Everything… yeah… simply everything flashed in front of my eyes and I broke down…. To get myself straight on my feet I drank in the bar… And you know the rest. That man told you the truth. I shouted at him this morning when he again tried to show his so-called concern for me. That’s all…” Sanika stopped as she kept weeping quietly without letting herself to be heard on the phone. But Atul could make out what that she crying.
“I am sorry Sani for being so rude… I think you should take rest, but before that just talk to a bit to your kids.” Atul handed over the phone and the voice came, “Mamma, how are you? I am missing you a lot.” It was Anika and her soft voice tore Sanika’s heart. She sobbed bitterly as she spoke to her but before she could talk more there was another voice over lapped on Anika’s. It was Anshul. “Mom, I am grown up now and so I sure understand that you are crying and missing us so much. Don’t cry Mom and come back soon.” She spoke to them for some time and asked them to give the phone to Atul again but Atul was not around strangely.
She remembered when she initially shared all her heart with Atul after their engagement he had said one thing that time: “The moment you make sure that the past is not hurting you anymore, that moment you will realise that your heart is empty to accommodate another person. But the moment you feel hurt because of your past you will know that you still have kept that old person in your heart.”
She screamed at the top of her voice to take out her angst but there was no one to hear her agony in that sophisticated hotel room.
Neuroscience – Motivation is a desire to perform an action…
Psychological Theories – Motivation can be conceived of as a cycle in which thoughts influence behaviors, drive performance, affects thoughts, and the cycle begins again.
Natural Theories – The natural system assumes that people have higher order needs, which contrasts with the rational theory that suggests people dislike work and only respond to rewards and punishment.
The above three theories made me conclude about what motivation actually is….
It is a desire to do something influenced or driven by our thought processes for achieving a desired goal or something that satisfies us.
I am a person who is very unstable. Now don’t get disturbed with that word ‘Unstable’. I fail to motivate myself when it comes to a routine work. I am mostly a very creative person and feel very de-motivated doing a regular and routine job every day. Probably, most people can relate with me and that’s why the natural theory mentions about two factors to which usually my kind of people respond or get motivated to – reward or punishment. 😉
That may be about my work life or daily household chores but in my life I have always felt that I get motivated when I see a need in a human heart. Let me explain…
Last couple of months were bit tough for me. A month back I was in a very extreme mental condition. I was grumpy, sad and absolutely disturbed when I received a ping on my Whatsapp. One of my closest friends who said: “Chiradeep, I just want to cry.”
When I am down, I usually don’t go to any social network or chit chat with anyone but just sulk into my own sadness. But I quickly responded to her, “You can cry if you want to… Are you in a position to cry over the phone?” She said yes and I called her to talk with her. She cried over the phone while talking with me and I let her do so.
And you know what?
I was out of my low state and was ready to take up the challenge I was facing.
Many persons with empathy can relate with me too in this regard. I tend to feel better and rejuvenated when I see others in pain. My heart goes out for them forgetting my own challenges and struggles.
I also tend to get motivated when I was given a target or reminded of my higher calling. Like when I feel down and de-motivated being an expressive person that usually reflect on my statuses or profile pictures or timelines or quotes on YourQuote. Lo and behold my friend Prabhjot usually asks almost within an hour of such changes, “Why have you changed your privacy settings? Why can’t I see the blue ticks when I send messages to you? See, Chiradeep if you stay negative then what will happen to us?”
That pricks me harder and motivates me to be back on track again.
There’s a saying that, “the one who loves you more, hurts you more”. And if I add to that line then I would say, “The one who is the cause of your irritation, is the cause of your motivation as well”.
Yeah, you guessed it right!
My wife has always been the factor of my motivation and inspiration. If no one encourages me for my work or song or write up it is she who never fails to appreciate and praise my work whatever may be the case. Sometimes she says it on my face that she doesn’t like this or that. But that makes me to do it in a much better way to get praise at least from her. I would like to say that if I could compose music today it’s all because of her or she being my motivation behind it.
I perform well when I am challenged and have a target in front of me. And both the above cases motivate me out of challenges that I wish to take on.
There’s one last but not the least of all which has been my motivation since my childhood. And I can’t hide it from you.
The Bible says,
Take delight in the Lord, and he will give you the desires of your heart.
And He was truly faithful to what He had promised from the beginning. Whenever I lose that motivation in my heart He encourages me from within and gives that desire in my heart to do what is right. And that is why I kept on moving with a smile on my face despite of all my follies, all my weaknesses, all the adverse situations around me, all the struggles that I have to go through.
Friends! Never lose heart… look around you… there will be motivation somewhere lurking at you and waiting for you to grab it for your benefit.
Legacy is such a word that many are afraid of facing it. But it is always my desire to leave something behind me. It is such a word that I am not worthy of it because the legacy left by the greats like Mahatma Gandhi, Raj Ram Mohan Rai, William Carrey etc., are unthinkable for me yet I think about it many times. I have a desire to leave something behind me for the world to follow it. I want to leave something like a baton so that the race will continue even when I am out of the race. 😛
During many memorial services I have witnessed, friends and relatives talk about the deceased person in whose name the memorial service is conducted. They remember the good qualities of that person and how he or she has been such a help to the society or family. Even I have shared about one or two people in their memory.
Now when I keep myself in one of those beds, lying unmoved with all my friends and relatives all around me crying while remembering me, telling and discussing about me what would be the conversation or the topic or the subject!!!
Will they be talking about how I used to stay jovial and smiling at all times or how I used to make people comfortable, talking with them?
Will they be talking about how I make fun of others at times or how I make fun of myself at difficult times?
Will they be talking about how I have struggled in life or how much pain that I went through?
Will they be talking about my failures because of my weaknesses or the frustrations that I had to go through?
They have the liberty to think whatever they can and I really won’t be having any control over it or neither I would be present to motivate them to talk this way or that way. But actually I can control their thoughts partially when I am alive. When I am alive I definitely can work on my attributes so that when I die people remember them and inspire each other to follow them.
But what am I going to leave behind for the people?
If I do a stock taking of my own strengths and qualities then I would pick “Owning a Relationship” to be the number one though sometimes I have failed in some of the crucial relationships in my life. And my failures make me to stay down, low, humbled, away from self praising and give all glory to God, the creator who has given me that quality for a purpose, for His purposes, to be carried out in His ways.
My failures also give teach me how to sharpen my quality more in His strength… How to strive for more… How to own relationships better and effectively…
I have always longed for people… longed for being with them… longed to understand them and own them as mine. I don’t know how it was developed within me but it just did and I praise God for that. I know how comforting it is to be accepted and understood. I have seen the joy in those faces of people when I accept them wholeheartedly without even judging what they have done or what state they are in. In my case as well I feel great when someone own me by accepting me wholeheartedly. Initially God did it when I came to Him with my iniquities and later I felt whole, comforted.
My desire is to leave behind this legacy for the people of this world around me.
The Bible says,
“A good man leaves an inheritance to his children’s children.”
I just want to follow it by striving for it till I die so that I can inherit the quality that I have to the next generation.