SOMETHINGS AREN’T MEANT TO BE

Imagine the late 90’s… Young me in my first job. First, brush with the Internet. Luckily nature of our organization was such that we had unlimited access to the Internet. Life was fun with loads of work spiced with chat rooms and chat friends. Visual Basic was open in one window and the chat room open in another window (I know what you are thinking we did some good amount of work also). Actually, that was our window to the outside world. Met lots of girls and boys and chatted away on every topic under the sun. But as it happens some are bound to linger on longer and become good friends.

One of them was a guy in armed forces. And I was besotted with men in uniform. If you have grown up in the vicinity of IMA or NDA you will understand why I said that. We found that these Gentlemen Cades (GCs) were always more of a gentleman as compared to the boys we used to see in college or our neighbourhood.

Coming back to the story. I chatted with him daily. Even though he belonged to the same city as me currently he was posted at some far-off location. We became very good friends. We exchanged multiple messages or emails in a day. Even though I loved chatting with him there was no romantic nature to our talks.

As days progressed, he told his younger sister about me. She was very excited to meet me. She wanted to speak to me. So, I gave my number (remember these are the days of landlines only and one of the extensions of these landlines are always in parents room). Eventually, she called. I spoke to her at length. She was a pleasant chirpy girl. What I didn’t know that my Dad had heard the conversation and couldn’t figure out who this girl was as she was not one of my friends.

Anyways I was asked about her and I blurted out the whole story. Now comes the twist. I was not admonished or anything. Since he was from the same caste or religion as us and was obviously eligible. My parents thought he could be a good match for me. My parents met his mother (his father was no more). I met his sister. Saw his photo for the first time (imagine! How naïve!). And everyone seemed to like each other. Now that the families had put the idea into our minds. Our talks obviously turned romantic. He was coming home for the holidays. The wait began. 

I suddenly started liking “Kaho na pyaar hai…” songs. All mushy mushy.

When he actually came home. He called to meet me in a restaurant. That is where he dropped the bombshell that his family was the carrier of a rare genetic disease and he was a carrier of the gene. But if I didn’t have that gene then our progeny won’t get affected. Me the forever optimistic was okay with it… He said he was worried about his sister though as she was a female carrier and so chances of it being passed on to her progeny are very high. That will make her marriage very tough. I still thought it was no big deal and we will brave out whatever life has in store for us.

So all seemed set in our relationship. When one fine evening he called and said that his whole extended family was admonishing him that how can he think of his own marriage when his sister’s future was bleak… he had responsibilities towards his family… he was being selfish… he was thinking only about himself… the list of accusations was long…

And he called it off. 

My father was livid. He just exploded on him. No amount of talking or cajoling from my side changed his stance. And he just dropped out of my life. I was really heartbroken at that time. I didn’t understand what hit me. I was wholeheartedly ready to support him then why was I being punished.

But as they say, some things are not meant to be.

It is a sweet little episode in my memory now. Maybe we both were very young at that point of time to make such huge decisions in our lives.

I got to know from a common acquaintance that he and his sister both are happily married now. And me, I too am blissfully living with my hubby and kids.

FIRST LOVE IS NOT IMPORTANT, BUT LAST IS

They say first love is the true love and last love, but this was not so in my case. My first love ended up as a failure where there were too many restrictions, besides being at the age of immaturity. Though the relationship lasted long, it couldn’t survive and I was pretty much sure that I am not going to fall in love again. However, I was proved wrong when a phone call came.


It wasn’t a typical crank call, but the person knew quite much about me, which was very surprising. Scared and disturbed I was initially and hence I tried to ignore. But, the guy kept calling me. I tried every trick to keep the calls away, but each one failed. He actually threatened me to call my parents and then take their permission to talk to me, for he wanted to marry me. I was in no mood of marrying at that time and was afraid what if he really called them up. Not taking any chances, I agreed to talk to him. Gradually I got used to his calls and there came a time when I actually fell in love again. Yes, I was in love with a voice basically, because I didn’t know anything about that guy, who he was or where he lived. Strange, yet true! My friends used to tease me and would say, “Is that guy for real? Does he exist in real life?”

Once I confronted him, he agreed to meet me. He seemed to be a nice guy, but he remained a mystery as I didn’t know about him, his family, doubt if he even told me his real name or not! Then all of a sudden, the frequency of his calls lessened and he gave the excuse of his mother who was upset with our relationship. I have no clue whether he was telling the truth or not, but at that point of time, I had to believe whatever he said. The mystery came to an end when I couldn’t connect to his phone number.

Throughout my break-ups, one thing that remained constant was this best friend of mine with whom I could share my woes and became my soulmate eventually. Though we couldn’t be each other’s first love, we remain each other’s ‘last love’ and ‘love forever’.

As the classic quote says, “First love is important, but last love is very important. Because, first love changes the nature and last love changes the life.”

GRATEFULNESS: WHAT OTHERS THINK ABOUT IT?

Being grateful while the world crashing around us is always difficult. At the beginning of this year, as we still struggle with many issues, I am happy that we are concentrating on gratefulness. Thanks to Geetmalini and Rajnandini who have been planned out this month so very well.

There was no writer for tonight but I was not in a mood to leave this slot go just like that. So I thought to quote a few outside bloggers and writers who have spoken a lot about this expression called, gratefulness.

Let’s visit their minds and hearts to check out their perspectives about gratefulness:

I thank the Lord for giving me a platform to write the things that I want to air out the things that I can air out. I have avoided my friends because answering the question “how are you” is just the hardest one to answer right now. There are things that I can’t talk about, not with my parents, not with my friends — things that hurt so much to speak about. I thank the Lord for being the one whom I can always call unto– someone who won’t get tired, someone who won’t be burdened by my burdens! Someone who hears me unconditionally, someone who won’t blame me, someone who won’t say “I told you so.”

I so relate myself to the author, Ms. Janis who so beautifully wrote this article.

Ms. Betul Erbasi says in her blog: “… focus on what is lacking is not healthy and it gets me nowhere. I can’t get my family here, nor can I go stay with them. The only thing I do to myself in this case is just make myself sad. This sadness in turn makes me irritable and unproductive.”

She was right. If our focus is always on the negatives then we can’t be of sound mind at all. We can’t focus on the things that are important in our lives, for ourselves and for our families.

Mr. Ashok rightly points out what I said in my article a week ago. He says, “Once we become grateful for every circumstance, every situation, every happening in our life: we shall always be joyous and at peace. And that this gratitude should not be kept only for big and momentous happenings of our lives, but should be expressed in our day to day blessings. We take so many of our blessings for granted, as our birthright!”

In the end, I want to conclude with this last quote from Dr. John Persico Jr. At the end of his article he poses a few thought-provoking questions for the readers, for all of us and I am quoting them all here:

Time for Questions:

What are you most grateful for today?  When was the last time you expressed your gratitude to someone you care about?  How often do you stop to think about how much you have to be grateful for?  Are you grateful for the things that really matter in your life?  What if you took time each day to be more grateful for your life?  What are you most ungrateful for?  How can you get rid of your ingratitude?

Life is just beginning. 

Interesting all of the above writers and their articles, right friends! Do visit their blogs and learn more about the heart-condition named gratefulness.

Stay Blessed!

 

AVOID SELFIE DEATHS

We had a very good week on the topic: “Selfie & Psyche“, click and check all the articles if you haven’t read them yet. But all the writers warned about the dangers involved in taking selfies with a mindless psyche. As human we have been given the best brains than all the living beings in this whole universe and thus it is necessary for us as human to be wise while capturing our selfies.

I found this video which describes few shocking incidents about selfie. Hope this will scare you enough to keep yourself safe and sound while capturing your fun picture.

Capture Safe Selfie, Stay Safe!

 

FAILED YET FAMOUS

Today is a day of celebration for Candles Online. This post will be the 700th post of Candles Online. It’s truly a milestone and the timing is absolutely appropriate for the occasion with a concluding day for the topic ‘Celebrating Failure‘.  

If I look back, I find myself sad and sorrowful two years back when Candles Online was not in the picture. The printed format failed to stay afloat. All my dreams had sunk in the deep sea. But now… we have been inspiring many around the globe, over 130 countries approximately. Candles Online had faced failures a lot of times yet it has become famous among many. It is still growing day after day because of some very committed people along with me and also because of God’s grace. 

I am going to let you watch an incredible video of 25 very famous world personalities who had failed in their lives or were considered failures by people initially, yet became world famous personalities afterwards. 

Be encouraged and never quit…

Stay blessed!

KNOW WHO’S WATCHING YOU?

How safe are you on internet? I was very scared when I watched this video… Please watch this video and be careful on internet. 

Careful! Stay Blessed!

PICTURES SPEAK LOUDER THAN ANYTHING ELSE

We came to the end of the this week discussing about our life, love, family, talents of people, travel stories and some motivational stuffs by posting beautiful pictures either captured by us or our friends and family members. Last 14 days were fun-filled and lot of things to learn.

To end this topic I thought of choosing 3 such videos from youtube which are presenting some amazing and thought provoking pictures either drawn, painted or captured by different artists.

I watched all three videos personally and really loved the pictures that were presented. I hope you all will love them.

So take a time out this time from reading and watch these videos: 

Have a Happy Weekend!!!