The comfort of a “conversation”

I am smiling to myself right now because I am back from probably what was the best 2 hours spent with someone who I’ve had a wonderful time with…a time when the food you ordered and the people around you didn’t matter – what was in focus was just you and the other person, so content in each other’s company – talking, laughing and just being happy in the other person’s presence. I haven’t felt like that in the longest time.  

BLISS!

“Conversation is food for the soul”

We often do not give ourselves and the people around us enough credit, when they come up to us to initiate a conversation, which may or may not lead to better times ahead. In a world where phones have taken center stage in between meals, conversations have often been left to exchanging pleasantries rather than the deep and meaningful stories that people have to share about themselves and life in general. It isn’t that people do not want to share, it is more the fear of being judged, so when two or more people come together for the sole purpose of being themselves and in the process of having fun along the way – that is where true stories and soulful conversations happen, and in all probability it would be the one time that your heart works faster than your brain, some use alcohol to induce the feeling, for others it comes out naturally.

The sheer art of talking and sharing your day or simply a part of your life that is closest to your heart with another soul is the best feeling ever, however, on the flip side, not everyone is cut out to openly express themselves. It takes the right company, situation, and sometimes even a particular topic to get people to have their say. There was a time in my life, when I actually wrote down various topics on a little piece of paper, tucked away into my pant pocket to keep conversations going, well… we all have different ways of learning, don’t we? – this was mine. Today, I might not need prompts to get me going, perhaps the right company and a suitable setting to set rolling good times ahead, but to find these hidden gems is a whole challenge by itself.

People might have actually forgotten what it is like to have a heart-to-heart conversation

Talking to a friend over lunch with your phone on the table and a distraction with every WhatsApp notification ring is a common occurrence nowadays. It might be a challenge to actually keep a conversation going without frequent interruptions, which may not be the healthiest recipe for a get-together. We can, of course, understand that there will always be certain things we could keep in mind to make a 1-1 special, a few of those points come to mind;

It cannot be more emphasized that being in the moment is by far the most important of all, no matter what you’ve left behind to have this meeting with the other person – your focus, attention, and energy should be channeled to this person. Let go of your gadgets, no multitasking – it is as simple as that. Put down anything else and face the person you are talking to. Talking is all about exchanging ideas and experiences. You need to remember each experience is unique Never try to equate that your experience is the same as theirs – IT IS clearly NOT. No two individuals nor events can ever be the same. There’s a limit to the MeToo moments two people can actually have. It makes you look really stupid and moreover, it is an absolute conversation killer. There’s a reason you have a conversation with someone, so when two alike people come together, have that child-like sense of wonder while communicating, facial expressions, smiles, laughter, the whole package. Enjoy the moment, and talk to the other person to be amazed. Let your curiosity ask more about their story. Exchange stories and end up making new ones together, and lastly, Allow ideas to come into your mind and speak them out. Keep it spontaneous. But always remember that respect is a two-way street. Pauses work great, they keep the listener glued to what you have to say next… but of course, pause in the right places in a sentence.

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Well, like everything in life, there will always be limitations. It takes effort to keep a conversation going, more so when you aren’t in the mood for one in particular, or it is someone who you don’t really fancy – at such times, pleasantries and small talk could do wonders. What hurts the most, of course, is when conversations die a natural death. Oh! how sad a situation would that be. We’re probably very close, but we all hope that it doesn’t take away the power of the spoken word, for listening to people speak and replying to them, is by far the most spontaneous activity that people indulge in nowadays.

The emphasis on being in the moment, avoiding distractions, and truly listening to the other person is a valuable reminder in a world often dominated by technology and constant notifications.