FIGHT FOR RIGHT!

Freedom of speech is under peril and suppression is on the rise. This has been a constant fabrication for centuries. But today’s risk is not only being incited by tyrants and sovereigns, as was the case in the past. Rather, it is being stoked up by the very people who are thought to protect this principle: democratically elected bureaucrats, artists, and journalists.

Article 19 of Human Rights declares that “everyone has the right to freedom of opinion and expression”. Yet, this right is unquestionably not certain because of the basic components of language.

Words, sentences and passages release impacts. They provoke sentiments in audiences and users. Language is never unbiased.

But far too often it is the case that analysts and diplomats give rise to unrealistic and absurd social aspects through the means of their platforms. They post, tweet and share to turn the tide of public opinion in or against sensitive matters, using inception and inducement to their personal cause.

Grievously, these radical viewpoints are not just limited to the boundaries of society. Rather, they are part of the game for governments in the mainstreams. At times of elections, these governmental bodies themselves hints that the right to freedom of speech is being used for worthless, adverse and evil purposes. This leaves us with a bigger problem, how to make sure there’s no obvious abuse of one’s right to freedom of speech and freedom of expression.

Owing to the heedless exercising of our right to freedom of speech, the decree to reduce the liberty of viewpoint and effect is, regrettably, growing powerful. It is an extremely saddening reality that general theory of common man infers that the circumstances are worse enough that they want their governments to resolve to forbid such speeches and therefore propose degrees of censorship.

Though the aim of forbidding people from making an attacking comment is good, it nevertheless serves as a catch-22 situation because it would deliver the governments with way too much authority in selecting what is or isn’t offensive. With power comes duties – and in this singular context, one’s duty includes not invoking disorder, chaos and mayhem. It is hence obvious why people would want to back governmental impose of censorship upon the manipulation of freedom of speech.

Only and only by using language for the right causes can we secure the liberal right to freedom of speech. However, like I always say, this isn’t a one-way road. Well-known figures, shouldn’t use blasphemy or profanity in a manner that justifies extensive monitoring and restrictions of our speech.

To sum it up I would like to recite Voltaire’s famous quote: “I disapprove of what you say, but I will defend to the death your right to say it”.

ABUSING THE POWER OF FREEDOM

I was wondering, what are in the world that gives us the power of freedom which we ultimately abuse or manipulate or misuse. And I found quite a number of things that allow us this Power of Freedom. And tonight, I would love to talk about them one after the other.

LEFT ALL ALONE

Have you ever stayed all alone at home? What do you do when you are all alone? Do you do things which are not allowable or permissible when your family members are around? Do you just freak out? Do you roam around naked (nothing to care about) in the house? Do you wait for that time when you can be left alone in the house so that you can accomplish your mischievous acts?

But why do we do like that?

I have stayed many times, all alone in my house. And that is the time I feel I have all the powers of this earth. That is the time when I feel, I can do everything that I want to as there’s no one to watch me or instruct me or interfere in my matter or obstruct me. I feel I have all the freedom I can ever have at that particular moment of aloneness. But that is the time I was put to test – The Test of Utilizing my Freedom.

No elders or parents would leave a kid alone in the house because they know that they are not matured enough to utilize their freedom. They can even put themselves to great danger. So, they were not given that liberty or freedom to stay alone at home.

My uncle who is also the founder of the organization I work in, always says one thing: “I don’t like tying you up with rules and regulations or police around you, but allow you the freedom to grow and explore yourself within this organization with diligence and sincerity.”

But somewhere we lack to handle that power of freedom bestowed on or entrusted to us. I have failed in it many times, I won’t lie. And I know we all fail at this or that point of time in our life when we were left all alone.

The Bible says – “Whoever isolates himself seeks his own desire; he breaks out against all sound judgment.“

DARKNESS

By darkness, I mean the opportunity of not being caught or seen. This is actually quite similar to being left all alone but there’s a difference here which I will explain.

Suppose, in a hall where many are celebrating an occasion and the parents of a boy barred him not to tease the small girl of another couple. But unfortunately, there is a power cut and the hall became pitched dark for two minutes. And that darkness gave the boy the power of freedom and he went and pinched the cheeks of that little girl, to which she started squealing aloud. The boy would not have been punished severely by his parents if he would have obeyed his parents and would not have misused that momentary freedom he got because of darkness.

Thieves get that power of freedom when it is night or dark. Trust me, things that are done in darkness or undercover are never a righteous or pious one. Bribes are always given under the table.

Are we waiting for the lights to switch off so that we can misuse the power of freedom we get because of that darkness? Keep pondering.

The Bible says – “Everyone who does evil hates the light, and will not come into the light for fear that their deeds will be exposed.“

MONEY/WEALTH

Money gives the purchasing power as well as the power of freedom to its owner. And mostly, they misuse it.

I remember, when I used to get a small salary, my monthly budget was small obviously and above that my desire to acquire things were lesser. But when I got a good amount of money at the beginning of the month, I felt that power of freedom to buy this, that and many other things which I never used to think of. Don’t think that I am talking about necessary items needed at home. I am talking about useless things which I buy sometimes and regret later on.

In most of the lower-middle-class family, you would find them struggling after 25^th of every month. Why? Because they used up their money lavishly using their power of freedom in the beginning and have nothing or very less money to buy the essentials for the last fourth or five days.

Hilarious??? But that’s the truth.

The Bible says very interestingly – “Why should fools have money in hand to buy wisdom, when they are not able to understand it?”

If I go on like this, I can find many such things that allow us complete freedom, either for some time or forever. Like the gift of FREEWILL, Power of Freedom is also attached with a series of responsibilities to it which are needed to be carried out in a better way and not to misuse it.

Whether it is in our home among all the family members, whether it is within the marital boundary, whether it is at our workplace, we do get that power of freedom in our hand to exercise it. Do we use them wisely or misuse it for our selfish desires and addictions?

Remember: “The abuse of liberty leads to bondage, the bondage of sin.”

Keep reading, keep pondering…

Stay Blessed!

EXPLOITING THE FREEDOM

Sia (distant relative) and Nikhil have married two years ago. First few months went so well. But gradually, Sia realized Nikhil was controlling her. He wouldn’t allow Sia to talk to anyone, including her parents. If she talked to her parents, Nikhil would abuse her for this. Also, he would ask her to wear only the clothes approved by him and eat what he likes. At first, Sia thought her husband was caring for her but then it became suffocating for her. She would forgive him every time but Nikhil would never change. Now, they live separately and are on the verge of getting divorced.

I have a friend who was in a relationship with a girl long ago. Like every other guy, he too was smitten on his girl. For him, the girl was perfect and so he loved her a lot. He made sure not to control his love. The girl had many guy friends. Whenever my friend would ask about those guys, she would say they were just her friends. However, the girl was cheating on him and was dating many guys. After knowing the reality, my friend ended the relationship but she would call him every other day and would say, she doesn’t want to leave him. Also, she was not willing to leave other guys as well.

Reema was dating a guy and both of them were in a long distance relationship. The girl was of liberal thinking and so, she never minded her boyfriend befriending other girls. The boy, however on the other end was having some other plans and so, he cheated on Reema. The guy started dating one of his friends and when Reema came to know this, he denied and accused her of suspecting him.

The above incidents tell about how people misuse the freedom given to them by their partners and how they don’t realize the value of their other half.

When it comes to a relationship, we preach so much about “space” and “freedom”. We say every human should have freedom irrespective of whatever relationship they are into. But do we actually retain its meaning? At times, we start taking this freedom for granted. Or, maybe we don’t understand the true meaning of freedom in a relationship.

If your partner gives you freedom, then this doesn’t mean you can have a relationship with other people at the same time or you don’t have to be in limits. When you get into a relationship with a person, that person becomes special. But if you exploit the space, no one is as evil as you. Misusing the rights allowed to you doesn’t make you great. This shows, you have no respect for your partner and you do not value him/her.

Concluding, I can only say that – when you value the space given by your partner, the relationship becomes a fairy-tale but when you become controlling or crossing the limits, you ruin the relationship.

USE FREEDOM IN THE BEST POSSIBLE WAY

One day I was deeply drowned at work when my cellphone rang flashing her name… I paused for a second, answered the phone. Before I could even utter a word she said, “Aastha, listen, just listen.. If I need shelter for a couple of months along with my daughter at your place, would you be fine with that? My sister is getting married this May and I want to leave my husband after that. I am done handling this marriage. I want to get out of it”, “That’s not a problem, but are you ok? Where are you now?” I was worried about her. She said she is doing fine, disconnected the call saying she would call later.

Her name is Ujwala. I met her on a group trip to Goa. We were standing besides the bus waiting for a lady to join us. She is a married woman with a small kid (2 years then), travelling solo.. It makes me happy when I see women, especially married and who have kids travel. It can be relaxing and liberating at the same time. A white color Swift stopped besides us. Ujwala got out of the car holding her little girl. A few mins later, we heard loud shouting followed by Ujwala throwing her phone on the road, crashing it into pieces. Her husband took the baby from her, brought her to us, bid her good bye and he left. I sat beside her in the bus, the whole night she was very silent. She wasn’t crying either. I did not make any attempt to talk with her except for exchange of names. The next morning, we were on our way out to the beaches nearby, when she slowly made her first attempt to talk.. , “I think you saw what happened last night. I am sorry, it was embarrassing for me too. That’s my husband. He can be very irritating at times so much that I cannot take it“. I told her that’s fine and not to worry about that getting noticed.

It was a three day trip to Goa. Ujwala enjoyed her time during the trip though she was moody at times. She drank, smoked weed for the first time. (I neither drink or smoke, so I get to enjoy all the scenes that happen after one is drunk :p) Ujwala had a hint of childishness in her which everyone of us noticed. It is hard to guess she is a mother if one hasn’t known that. On our way back to Bangalore she told me most of her story. She was crying, I was holding her hand consoling her. She said her husband is very controlling, abusive and doesn’t like it if she wants some space. By the end of the story she asked me,”Aastha, tell me what should I do? I don’t want my daughter to have an abusive father. She has all the right to have a free life unlike me who is bound by so many rules. If it was you in my situation, what would you do?“. I was taken aback by the sharpness in her eyes and the intensity with which she demanded an answer from me.. “Ujwala, I am no one to tell you what you should do. You have a little girl whose future is in your hands if at all you decide to part ways with him. I don’t know if your husband is going to agree to give her to you. It would be a battle in which you would be subjected to a lot of stress but you should ensure you little one is happy. Think about the consequences and the level of preparation needed mentally to handle all that. You should make a choice of what you can handle, me or no one else is entitled to make that decision for you..“

I met her on one more trip. Later on she said that she has been abroad for a week long trip and enjoyed it. Out of curiosity, I asked her, how often does she gets time to go on trips. She said once a month, internationally one or two an year and she travels alone while her husband and mother-in-law take care of her daughter. She complains that her husband watches cricket at home and that makes her feel bad as he isn’t spending time with her. I have heard a series of complaints from her about her husband over time about not giving enough freedom and was very confused.

I could not understand if I was overthinking about her. I wondered if I was judging her. What is freedom? Is it not going on solo trips as often as we like? Is it not getting time to spend with one self when our significant other is watching TV or doing whatever they like. Unless TV is what he/she does all day long, once in a while watching a series isn’t a problem. If we can enjoy watching that match we can join them or do something that makes us feel good. Holding a grudge on them for this and blaming is like victim blaming.

Ujwala is a trained dancer, she could have opted to teach dance to kids in her apartment, let alone teaching she could have participated in events that happen in her apartment complex. She sings so well, I would just love to hear her singing all day. She is a writer and writes her own blog. She has a full time job and a little kid. I think she is getting ample amount of time for herself. May she is just unable to define what freedom means to her?

Many of us do not define what makes us happy and find it convenient to blame on others for not giving us space. While this is one part of the problem, the second part could be that we are not respecting the time we are getting for ourselves. If we while away the time we have on social media and chit-chatting with others, then that is what makes us happy. Asking for more and more time while not utilizing the time properly is our problem than it is a problem with freedom in any relationship. Defining how much time we would need and what are we going to do with that time is an open dialogue we can have with the other person in the relationship. If the partner feels it is more than what they can handle, this should be the time we discuss than blame each other later. Me time and privacy are as important as being open for adjustments. If you always feel that you are the one sacrificing the me time, there are only three possibilities, either you are trying to fix your partner always or not getting the time or misusing it. What exactly is causing this would lead you to a solution… Just remember, freedom has limits too…

FREEDOM SANS RESPONSIBILITY = MISUSED FREEDOM

When little Mercy was not allowed to enter the kitchen or step out of doors without either of her parents accompanying her, she felt caged. A precocious child with just six years of experience on planet earth, she failed to understand why her ‘freedom’ was curtailed. She shared with her Diary Pal how she wished to be free!

Neha was a new bride. Transition from a nuclear family of four to an extended household of twelve hasn’t been easy for her. With the burden of household work and practically no me-time, she wished she could be free.

Jimmy hated his schedule. Wake up early in the morning and exercise before school, heaps of assignments to complete after school, tuitions for helping raise his grades that have been spiraling downwards of late, prepare for periodic tests and sleep off. No time to play or watch TV. To top it all, his mobile has been confiscated by his well-meaning father. At fourteen, Jimmy craves for freedom.

We all have such Mercys, Nehas and Jimmys within us and around us. Oh to have the wings of a bird and fly freely in the sky! But, how do we respond when given such freedom? Freedom is treasured by those who know its worth. It is misused by people who do not value it.

In this article, I’ll focus on the flip side of freedom in relationships.

1. Taken for granted – Shackles are mere objects as many others that one sees around, unless used to bind a person. A shackled person knows the value of freedom like no other. For a person who has never been shackled, freedom doesn’t connote much. As a result there is not much accountability for overt behaviour – be it words or actions. Bonded labourers in faraway lands, treasure freedom when released because once upon a time their freedom was highly elusive. Freedom in relationships is often misused when it is taken for granted. Every relationship is governed by certain unspoken rules of life (besides the clearly charted out ones). These territories of unspoken jurisdiction are the ones which are taken for granted.

The very next day of marriage, the husband decides to make two cups of morning tea for himself and his new bride. This morning routine goes on for days, after which comes a day that he is taken sick. Now if the wife comes back from her morning walk and throws tantrums on not getting her cup of tea, this is precisely a ‘taken for granted’ attitude. Doesn’t this happen often?

2. Lies and Deceit – When freedom comes easy, lies and deceit creep in subtly untaught. Often such lying and deceit go unnoticed till there is a full-blown problem at hand.

A child is given INR 100 to buy certain essentials that the mother requires. On returning, he gives the account of the amount spent and says that he has dropped the remaining amount in the donation box kept in the shop to help an NGO that takes care of orphans. He scores brownie points before his mother for his act of compassion, while in reality he has pocketed the change as a saving for his piggy bank. Another young girl permitted by her parents to spend a night to study with her female friend just before exams, sneaks out to spend the night in her boyfriend’s apartment.

3. Indulgence – Well, this is essentially a foot in the door technique! A little freedom initially emboldens one for more freedom either with permission or with coercion and compulsion. This is a common predicament of the parents of many teenagers, among others. Let me cite a true incident of a young couple who had come to me for Counseling.

A lovestruck couple married young, when both were 21 years of age. After the initial craze of being with each other wore off, the husband felt that he didn’t want to be tied down. He wanted to spend time with his friends (who were of course still studying in college!). The thoughtful wife didn’t throw any tantrums and let her husband have some free time without her. Gradually, those one or two hours of being with friends increased to whole evenings and at times even to night outs, thus annoying the wife. They celebrated their first marriage anniversary with a newborn in their arms. Still the husband’s evening outings and night outs continued. They had their second child two years later. Yet, no change in the young husband’s behaviour and a resultant friction between the couple! A little well-intended freedom created enough room for irresponsible behaviour.

4. Indiscipline – High levels of permissiveness leave no room for accountability. Hence, certain behavioural patterns ensue, sans accountability. Lets consider the common sleep-wake schedules. Without the help of an alarm or a loved one to wake up, most people would end up waking at mid-day. And without a self-check or being prodded by someone to go to bed on time, most people would end up sleeping earlier or later than required and thus would have a chaotic next day at work. Perks of limitless freedom!

In parenting, permissiveness is known for very few guidelines and rules coupled with fulfilling of all the demands of children sans accountability. Thus, children of permissive parents end up exhibiting the same behaviour as adults in their personal relationships and at their workplaces. A couple who have the laissez-faire approach to life are likely to end up with deep resentment for each other within a short span of time simply because their freedom has created inroads to several unwanted guests like anger, jealousy, lack of schedule, etc.

The above four discussed ways of misusing freedom do not in anyway advocate against freedom in relationships. Freedom with responsibility is the freedom that is enjoyed best. Freedom sans boundaries leaves the gateway open for several intruders to invade into our lives and create unwanted pandemonium. After all, not all things that are permissible are beneficial.

The Bible says –

“I have the right to do anything . . . but not everything is beneficial. I have the right to do anything . . . but not everything is constructive.”

WHAT IF THEY TAKE OVER THE WORLD?

To be very frank my exposure to robots is absolutely zero. Whatever knowledge I have is from the movies my husband and children are a huge fan of. After my marriage and kids I have been on a staple diet of movies like The Terminator series, The Transformer Series, The Star Wars Series, The Iron man series etc.

If you have seen any of these movies the robots are tall towering or having huge physical strength or having weapons to mass destruct the humans.

• In the Terminator Series the robots decide to take over the world and the humans are the resistance fighting with the robots
• In the Transformer Series the Autobots and Decepticons are two warring communities of Robots that can transform themselves into cars. The Autobots are friendly with humans but Decepticons are out to take over the Earth and destruct the humans.
• The Star Wars Series has all sorts of aliens and robots some are friendly but most are not.
• Iron man has an operating system JARVIS which is almost like human. The hero Tony Stark creates robots and other inventions which at times turn rogue and again are out to (Again) destroy humans.

So frankly speaking I am paranoid about something like the SkyNet (from terminator) taking over the world. We are creating robots that are faster than humans, have more abilities, are more powerful etc. What if they decide that they are superior to the humans and they don’t require the humans? Hope we don’t make a Frankenstein that starts considering the humans dispensable.

I don’t know if it is plain paranoia or is there a real chance of such a thing happening. Recently I read an article about the Facebook and Google using Artificial Intelligence and the AI producing more program code which the humans are having a tough time following / decoding. What if it keeps building on over it and reaches a stage where we don’t know what is being coded. Anyways I always feel irritated that the AI in FB decides whose comments will be seen on my FB wall.

There have been incidents in which Alexa has accidentally recorded some private conversations in the house and sent it to someone else. Ok this was an error but what if someone deliberately programs it to eavesdrop on us.

Given a choice I would prefer interacting with a human rather than a robot. I know humans have their own shortcomings but at least I know how to deal with them.

On the other hand, I am sure that many of you will be thinking that I am being too old fashioned or rigid in my thought process. Even my family thinks so. My eldest son wants to be a robotic engineer, and make a Iron Man Suit of his own. So I might as well make peace with them.

Robots are here to stay; they will definitely be a part of our future. Alexa and Siri are already being widely popular. Only thing is I hope the future engineers keep sufficient safeguards on their inventions.

I am not being a doomsday announcer I am just being skeptical about the robots.

ROBOT – I WANT THEM MORE

Satisfaction in the Magnificence of Human Mind

It was a winter evening, I was in Shibuya, Tokyo and I went to Henna Café. I was wondering as I waited for the Manager to come so that I can order for a cup of coffee but I find no one around. Suddenly, Barista turned to me and said, “Good evening Sir, Welcome to Henna Café”

Me: (Yelling…) Manager… Manager…
An unknown man from behind: Yes Sir, I am the owner of this Café. Don’t worry.
Owner: Sir, this is Robot Barista to help you.
Owner: Barista, Sir is our foreign guest, please take good care of him.
Barista: Sir, What do you like to have?
Me: One Café Latte.
Barista: Okay Sir, can you please wait for a minute.
Me: Okay. Here is 320 yen.
(In a few minutes, Barista came with a cup of Café Latte and a Forbes magazine)
Barista: Excuse me, Sir, here is your Café Latte. Have a good time!
Me: (in a fearful tone) Okay… okay.
While having Coffee the Owner from the corner table walked to my table and asked, Excuse me, Sir, How is Coffee?
Me: (in a very comfortable tone) Oh, it’s quite rich and tastes awesome!
Owner: Thank you, Sir. Are you new in the town?
Me: Yes, I’m an Indian and have come here for some work.
Owner: Oh…Indian! Very nice people. I love India.
Me: Thank you. If you don’t mind can I ask you a question?
Owner: Yes Sir, Please feel free.
Me: Why you do not have any human staff? Why Robot?
Owner: Sir, One robot is equal to four human staffs… Moreover, I have Robots to do all our works because I believe this way we can be more productive and can serve better coffee at a reasonable price.
Me: Wow… that’s a great idea! By the way, can I touch your Robot? Oops, I mean Barista…
Owner: (laughingly…) sure, Sir, you can.
Barista: (with a thank you card), Thank you, Sir, Please visit us again.
Me: (grinning), Thank you, Barista.
I touched Barista’s head and found it doesn’t give electric shock like my steam iron. Again I touched his hand…wow, it doesn’t give electric shock at all. Let me shake hand with him and see. 

Blue lights blinked on Barista’s eyes and he said, happy to meet you, Sir.

Wow…what a sophisticated imagination!

It was just my imagination but that is what happens in many Elite Cafés, Hospitals, Homes, Restaurants, Institutions, and majorly the I.T. Offices. Probably, in another couple of decades, we all will have our personal robots in our homes and offices just like we have smartphones today. The world with Robotic technology is wonderful and can lead us to INTELLIGENCE and PRODUCTIVITY.

Isn’t so amazing to see the magnificence of the human mind! A few days back I came to know our scientists have already invented robots which can be used by humans for copulation. That’s so bizarre. Yet, the human doesn’t want to leave any stone unturned in making our lifestyle More Sophisticated – More Enjoyable – More Affluent.

We human are hooked by the ultimatum – “THE MORE”. Satisfaction has become the ultimate pursuit of our life. The finitude of our human strength smells us like rotten eggs.

WHEREAS, The Bible says,

“As for man, his days are like grass;
he flourishes like a flower of the field;
for the wind passes over it, and it is gone,
and its place knows it no more.”

God created humanity in His own image but He has also bounded him with finite wisdom and strength. Let’s enjoy life in its finitude instead of trying to fill the bottomless pit – SATISFACTION OF HUMAN HEART.