I WISH THEM TO STAY HAPPY FOREVER

Children are no doubt one of the beautiful creations of Almighty. The innocence and their mischiefs can be cherished forever. Well, my parents say when I was a kid, I used to ask numerous questions. For that reason, I was quite curious and tried to learn everything around me. My mother says this annoyed my family members at times. Hearing this I thought, “O God! Did they use to get annoyed by my question? How could they?

Well, I understood this after I saw my niece Mishti and nephew Vasu doing something similar to what I used to do (according to my family members). Mishti my darling niece is the apple of my eyes. She is my little angel and I wish to see her happy as always. But sometimes she becomes annoying when she gets mad at her mother or on other family members. The reason why she gets mad is, she gets to hear scoldings from us. At times, she won’t listen to us and will do things that she is not supposed to do. This makes us angry and we eventually scold her. Once you have scolded her, she will stop talking to you, till she forgets her anger. 

My nephew Vasu too does things that will make you laugh. One day while I was talking to my nephew on call, I asked him ‘where is your grandpa?’ He said, ‘Don’t you see? Grandpa is sitting beside me. Eat vegetables then you will see.’ I was amazed after what he said. Not because he asked me to eat vegetables but because he knew eating vegetables is good for eyesight. He always advises me to cross the road properly, though he himself is three years old and can’t cross the road on his own. Also, he will make sure that you are wearing tidy and presentable clothes. If not, he will ask you to change your clothes by saying, “Go change your clothes, otherwise, I won’t go with you.” I love listening to his talk.

Both of them behave like elders and will then give their own adorable opinions.

There are many more incidents and sweet talk of my niece and nephew. I wish them abundant happiness and love. After all, children are no less than real angels.

DISCARD THE INSECURITIES

When we talk about insecurity, it can be understood as an uneasy feeling which can occur when we feel inferior in front of others. This surrounds us from several irrational thoughts and negative vibes. Though we know, we are absolutely fine but when we see others in a better state than us, we might become insecure. 

The same has happened to me a number of times. I remember, when I was in class 7, my shoes became old and the buckle broke. I used to feel so insecure among my friends, though my father promised to purchase a new pair after a few weeks. For me, waiting for a few weeks was similar to an eternity. I didn’t feel confident while standing in the assembly. However, the broken buckle could be fixed but then my toes started to feel uncomfortable, due to a slight increment in my height. Now I had to purchase a new pair else my toes would come out any time. I couldn’t ask my father to purchase the shoes immediately, as he had some financial burden. Though he bought me a new pair of shoes after a few weeks, as promised. 

Not only this, I used to feel insecure while I used to sit with my college friends. Coming from a middle-class family, I knew I can’t afford everything and I shouldn’t have everything even if I can afford them. As we need to save money for the crisis. But the insecurity in me didn’t understand this. I used to feel quite uneasy when I used to sit in the canteen. Though I had money, I preferred to save it. 

Sometimes, the insecurity in me forbade me to hang out with my friends. Even if I wore my best clothes, I used to feel insecure due to my short height. I used to wear those heels to look taller. Sometimes, I felt insecure due to my dusky skin tone and pouty lips. I used to think, ‘My friends are so taller, I look so short’, ‘My lips are not so beautiful as the actresses,’ ‘My skin tone is dusky, I wish I had fair tone’ and what not.

But then I learned, these things don’t matter. All that matters is how beautifully one carries his/her flaws. I learned to accept myself the way I was. Trust me I became so happy afterward. Life seemed to be quite beautiful. Now I hardly care about how people perceive me because I know my flaws make me beautiful and there is nothing to feel insecure about myself. 

I often come across people who feel insecure among people. To them, I would like to say, get over these insecurities. Embrace your flaws and explore your inner beauty. Do not feel insecure about your financial status. Once you discard all the insecurities, you will gain divine happiness and satisfaction. Insecurity will never make you strong as it decreases your potential. If you are happy with what you have, nobody is richer than you.

SOMETHING I DON’T UNDERSTAND

We as human beings, are capable to comprehend so many things happening around us. Still, we are unable to understand many of the things. It is not that our mind is not so developed or is childish. It might be the case with some of us but we are at least capable to understand the basic things. But I don’t understand a few things. These are:

    1. People don’t pay heed to generic things: I remember ever since I started to read science books during my school days, we were taught to SAVE WATER. We also took oath on various occasions to save water and make the optimum use. But do we actually do that? On railway stations, hotels, and at somebody’s house we waste water by thinking, it is not going from my pocket. A similar thing goes with electricity and food. People hardly understand it is going from our own earth
    2. People not giving seats to elderly people: Like other people, I have been using public transport for going to my office and to come back to my place ever since I came to Bangalore. Almost every day, I find people, who would shamelessly sit on the seats and would feel no need to let the senior citizen sit. Moreover, some men will even remain seated on ladies’ seat stating that they are sitting with their family on the seat. I don’t understand why do people talk about social norms and not follow them in their real life.
    3. People treating animals badly: Humans are no doubt the most powerful creation of the Almighty. He gave brains to humans and many other qualities. Still, we don’t use our brains when it comes to treating animals. There are some people who  won’t bother if a dog is sleeping on the footpath. They will intentionally ride their bike over the limbs or the tail of the dog thinking that how does it matter? Really? Would you like being treated the same way?
    4. People thinking garbage pickers to be dirty: It is an irony that we dump garbage here and there on roads in the open and we consider ourselves to be clean. On the other hand, those who clean garbage and take it to dump somewhere far from the population are considered to be dirty and unhygienic. 

Well, there are so many other things that people don’t understand or they choose to ‘not understand’. Whatever it is, the above are the things that I personally don’t understand.

I would be happy if someone could help me to understand these things. 

DEALING WITH PROBLEMS

Problems are inevitable. Everyone has to go through problems in their lifetime. Sometimes the problems are difficult enough to make us feel giving up what we are doing. We feel nothing is going right and therefore ‘I should quit’. But is that really a solution? 

Well, there is only one solution and that is to never lose hope. However one can avoid problems to some extent. Though one or another problem might keep raising its head, one can do a few things to keep problems away or deal with them. 

So what can do? Well, here are the tips:

  • Working rather than building expectations: Humans can never stop building expectations. Even if they don’t work they will have huge expectations. There is actually no problem with this but the problem arises when our expectations aren’t fulfilled. This can put us into stress, anxiety and may give birth to unexpected problems. So if you want to avoid any problems, work for it. That will surely help you.
  • Doing self-analysis: We know what we are capable of. Before getting into any work, make sure you analyze your capacity. The work that you might think is easy can be tougher and therefore you need to be prepared for that. Self-analysis will help you to avoid problems that you may incur while doing any work.
  • Thinking about the consequences: Whatever work you do, you must think of its consequences. As it has been said, ‘every action has an equal and opposite reaction’. Therefore one must think before acting.
  • Seeking help when needed: We need help at different stages of life. So one must not keep things to themselves when in need of help. It is good to ask for help. When you seek help, you will be able to tackle some of the problems.
  • Saying ‘no’ when needed: Saying no can be rude but sometimes it is good to say no. Especially when you are unable to fulfill somebody’s need. For example, if you have important work at home and if your colleagues ask you for dinner, then it is better to say a polite no. As you need to be at your home. If not, you will be inviting problems. 

Well to solve problems one needs to think rationally and working accordingly. But if you think the situation is baffling and you can’t divide your attention then it is better to prefer the one with the highest priority. This is indeed the best ways to deal with problems

MY PRINCIPLES, MY ADVICE

We people have no time to care for others. But when it comes to giving advice, we are always ready. The reason could be varying. One can get advice at any point of a life such as when the person is sick or when the person is moving to a new place. Even if we don’t know the other person, still we can’t keep calm without giving advice to people. 

Well, I too count myself into it. And so here I am to give my advice to my readers:

Believe Yourself: 

You are what you think of yourself. No one in this world knows you better than ‘you’ and, therefore, you need to believe in yourself. Your caliber is hidden in you and will shine only when you allow it to come out. The moment you stop believing in you, your caliber and talent disappear! Sometimes, people might feel, you can’t do a job because you have incapability. Still, you do the job. Why? Because you do not stop believing in you and that is your biggest strength. 

Love Yourself:

Love is one of the most beautiful feelings in this world. Not a single human can remain untouched by love. But that doesn’t mean you need to have someone with whom you can have a romantic relationship. Before falling in love with someone else, love yourself. Pamper yourself. Do things that make you happy and lively. Let your smile spread like a cool breeze. If you can’t love yourself, you won’t be understanding the true meaning of living and you won’t be able to love someone else. 

Eliminate Toxins From Your Life:

Every single person in our lives comes with a purpose. The purpose can be to love you, or to befriend you, or to make your life hell! Yes, there are people who love playing with someone’s emotions and feelings. They will come into your life and will pretend to be a well-wisher but at the same time will stab you in your back. They won’t be happy in your good and will find ways to drag you down. So, why to entertain such people in your life? If you think a person is making you upset and fills you with negativity, just ignore them and avoid meeting them without any second thought. But don’t keep grudges or hate them. Help them when they need you, but maintain your dignity and distance. The world is already full of toxins. Do not add more in your life. 

Live For Your Dreams:

Dreams are the reason we start to believe in ourselves. It is the thing that makes us aware of our talent and capabilities. It is a motivation for us to go ahead in life. So live for your dreams. Do what you can do to turn your dreams into reality. You have got one life therefore, make sure to make the best out of it. Once you start to work for your dreams, you get a step closer to your dreams. 

Motivate Others And Become Productive:

The aim of our life should not be to fill our stomach only. It should also include the motto of motivating others for something good. Let people know what they are capable of. Life is not when you breathe and earn for yourself. Life is when you help others to do something productive and meaningful. Become the reason for someone’s happiness. And that is when you will be able to say that you lived a life.

This five advice are my principles of living. I like to maintain my principles and work accordingly. It makes things easier for me. 

So live your life by believing and loving yourself, eliminate the toxins and help others. 

MY LESSONS FROM ALL MY BEGINNINGS

First times are hard to forget as it is the time when we step out of our comfort zone to do something which we had not done before. Either it brings sweet memories or it brings bad memories to us. Perhaps, therefore, first times are always known to be special. 

Well, I have so many first times in my life and today I am going to share two of my most memorable first times. These are so close to my heart and quite special to me.

First journey to Bangalore: After completing my bachelor’s degree, I came to Bangalore in November 2018. For me, it was not just an ordinary journey. It was a big step that I took out of my comfort zone. It takes about 48-50 hours by train to reach Bangalore. As I was going to Bangalore for the first time with so much luggage, my parents didn’t want me to go alone. Initially, I had planned to go with my friends but then the plan didn’t work out well. So I decided I would be going alone. I gathered my courage and spoke to myself, “if it is to be done then it has to be done now.” The train journey didn’t seem tiring to me. It was a fascinating and peaceful journey.

I enjoyed so much. 

While the train was departing from Patna, I promised myself, “I am not going to be weak. I will face whatever comes my way. If  it has to be done then I’ll make sure it gets done in the best possible way.” 

I arrived at Bangalore around 9:00 PM and booked an auto. My cousin came to receive me. I saw the city in dazzling lights and something in my heart said, “welcome Prerna! Your dreams are waiting for you. But for that, you will first have to spend a good time with struggles.” 

Well, the city seemed quite strange and confusing to me at first. But I have been exploring Bangalore all by myself. I love walking alone on the streets and is enjoying its weather. Though I travel across the world, I am never going to forget my first journey to Bangalore. It is one of the most beautiful memories of my life. 

First vote: Ever since I came to know what is an election and how important is one’s vote, I was quite excited for casting my vote. Well, I got the chance to cast my first vote in 2014 Loksabha Election. I remember I was so excited that I stayed awake the night before the election. I woke up early morning and made sure to get ready early. I had pressed my dress a day before itself. Seeing my excitement, my mother said, “it is just an election dear. Why are you preparing yourself so much?” But for me, it was the day when I would be practicing my right to vote. I was so restless to cast my vote that I asked my mother to get ready soon. Finally, we went to the election booth and I got the chance to cast my vote. 

There are so many first times in my life. All of them are safely stored in my mind. Though they are different, except one thing and that is they required courage to do. At first, they seemed intimidating but later they are no more intimidating. Some of them were bad and some of them were so good. But whatever it is, one should learn from their first times and should try to make the second times a better one. 

ACCEPT YOUR INDIVIDUALITY

I grew up watching my cousins wearing beautiful dresses and spending lavishly. I couldn’t do so as my parents didn’t have enough to allow me to spend beyond the genuine needs. All I could do was look at my cousins and take a sigh. I knew the financial condition of my parents and, therefore, I didn’t ask for more. But I always wanted to have what my cousins and my friends owned. I wanted those pretty sandals, dresses, and what not! 

As an ordinary girl, I too used to get fascinated by the lifestyle of the celebrities. I followed some of them to an extent my pocket could allow. I used to see how those celebrities followed a lifestyle to look elegant and presentable and it did influence me. I used to follow their eating and speaking style so that I too could look elegant. Gradually, I felt like being choked up. The influence of someone’s lifestyle was choking me. Maybe because for me, their lifestyle was hard to accept. For a moment, it did feel like fascinating but eventually, I decided to give up and follow my own lifestyle.

Leave about celebrities, even when I went to my village I saw girls of my age and younger to me wearing salwar-kameez. Honestly, I consider this to be one of the most-beautiful attire a girl can ever have. Influenced by those girls, I decided to quit my trousers and tees. Trust me, I couldn’t take the salwar-kameez for a long time. It was all about a week or two. I guess this happened because I personally never felt the urge to wear salwar-kameez all the time. I started to feel as if I am locked up in a dark room. I guess this happened because I was never used to living like them.

It is not only about clothes. When you follow a lifestyle, many things count in it. The food you eat, your sleeping schedule, your way of speaking, weekend plans, and much more. And it is completely okay if you are having a different lifestyle. Most of my friends go on a trip or go to some pubs on weekends. I, on the other end, love spending time with my books, answering Quora questions, and reading blogs. For me, going to parties and shopping seems way too boring and time-consuming. This amazes my friends and they wonder if I ever enjoy? Trust me, I enjoy a lot because I have my own life and a way of living. And I love it. It is not necessary that everyone will have a similar lifestyle.

Unless our soul is not convinced to follow a lifestyle, not just for the sake of following but because we love it, we can’t go a long way with that lifestyle. Lifestyle is not just a matter of a day or two. It is all about our comfort, upbringing, and the environment we live in. Today, I earn on my own but not as much as my friends do. With the money I get, I can buy whatever clothes I want or eat whatever I want but I can’t. I am more influenced by my lifestyle I have been following so far. But if you think the other person is having a better lifestyle then you must know it is not easy to step into one’s shoes. The best thing is to accept your individuality and live accordingly.