(In response to The Daily Post’s writing prompt: “Happily Ever After.”)
Marriage is an institution founded by God Himself. That’s why it is the oldest and the most unique institution. But so many times our marriage ship totters on the sea of life. And we get upset, downcast, sad, angry, irritated, depressed, disturbed, gloomy, miserable, unhappy, dejected, fed-up, etc.; the expressions and the emotions are unending. So many times it happens to me also. I feel the same way as you all do. In those circumstances I discovered three magic potions that has helped our marriage ship to drift smoothly on the wavering sea. The three magic potions are:
HUMILITY: Yes! This may hurt your male ego, but trust me this is magical. It works instantaneously. The Bible says, “Blessed are the meek: for they shall inherit the earth.” Your humility can help you to restore your lost possession. That’s the love and peace at your home. It is very difficult to practice meekness or humility but it is also very important to restore your possessions that help your marital ship float well.
I like this statement from another blog which I want to quote here: “When two persons begin to disrespect each other and talk down at themselves, a break-up looms. It does not matter how you started, once respect flies out the window, then the end is near.” Humility teaches us to respect each other and each other’s value.
I am trying hard to learn humility and practice it daily at home. Let’s practice humility in our marriages whether we are females or males.
AVAILABILITY: “Oh! I am so tired.” Yes, you may be. But don’t unwind yourself by watching TV. Go and spend some quality time with your spouse. You will feel more relaxed. My conscience always speaks to me this way when I don’t make myself available to my wife. This is also a very important and vital thing to keep our marital ship afloat.
I do watch TV and exercise my personal space a lot. But, I always think when we are married we should always exercise our personal space as little as possible. I haven’t been always able to follow it religiously. My selfishness motivates me to search for my personal space.
Sometimes our mobile phones, laptops etc, comes between the spouses as obstacles and keep us busy instead of available for each other.
I found this site – ”Purposeinleadership.com” very interesting which has some great lessons on marriage relationship. I want to quote one statement from this site which helps us to understand the Availability Factor in Marriage: “Whether utilizing technology, or giving tech a timeout, the key is to be proactive in seeing that technology serves your marriage and friendship and does not take away from it.”
So dear married friends, let’s make ourselves available to our partners leaving all the gadgets away when its needed.
HONESTY: This can hurt our partner on the spot but will make her / him happy and proud of our honesty later. If we lose our credibility in front of our partner, then it’s very difficult to handle or face bigger problems together at our homes.
Sometimes to avoid conflicts spouses lie to each other, but those lies create problems in the later stage making the walls between the spouses bigger & higher.
Sometimes cheating becomes a practice and replaces honesty among the spouses worsening their marriage relationship.
Whitney, a WP Blogger challenges the couples to be honest by asking them: “Does deceit have a place in your marriage? You can start today with a clean slate of honesty!”
Let’s speak clear and loud but not harshly, in fact as softly as possible, lovingly yet honestly.
The above three magic Cap Words can really build and develop our relationship with our spouses. Let’s practice Humility, Availability & Honesty in our marital relationship on a daily basis. We can be much relaxed and laugh out loud HAH HAH HAH (H-Humility, A-Availability & H-Honesty) again & again!
Author’s Bio: Chiradeep Patra is a finance man who works in a NGO at Kolkata. He is a writer, motivator & counselor.