CAN NEVER THANK ENOUGH

Dear Babai & Pinni,

There are days when you simply can’t express yourself good enough. There are only two reasons for that situation, either nothing much to say or so much to say that you find yourself amidst rare numbness and words simply don’t find their way from heart to mouth. I identify myself with the second reason. And I feel I will be in this situation till the end of my life : Can never thank you both enough for how you impacted my life at different stages and phases.

Babai, I have never seen a person as emotional and straight forward as you are. I have always been in awe of how far you have gone for the people you care for. Since the time I started understanding relationships and their beauty & importance in human life, I have seen you as a rock who stood by your brother (my father) in his thick and thin. At the times when relationships are motivated, made, twisted and broken by money, thanks to you we never saw such moments in our family. I saw how you would never take it lying down whenever people hinted disrespect towards my father. Your sibling love gave our generation sibling goals – to love, support and respect our siblings unconditionally. Thanks for making our family an epitome of brotherly love for the world to see, it isn’t an exaggeration.

It’s a popular belief that to make or break a family, the responsibility lies with the lady of the house. And I can proudly say that I belong to a family that got amazing women who no matter what makes sure that family bonds are not severed. And leading from the front is you, Pinni (Chachi/aunt). Babai’s (uncle’s) love for us can be understood by the linear nature of relationship we had – brotherly love. But you are the support system of Babai who always stood by his decisions. You embraced us as your own kids. You have always been my idol when I think about strong, independent woman. A woman with strong values who values family, wisdom being your second name, love and compassion is your identity. I am fortunate enough to share the same date of birth (same date, same month) with you. You have an immense impact on how a woman has to take charge of her family and bind it. After 11 years of marriage if I can relate to happiness and sorrows of my extended family from my husband’s side, its because of a wonderful lady like you. Thank you so much for all the love, motivation and inspiration you have showered on me and still doing it. And before I forget to mention, it’s always great to spend time with you, it’s fun second to none.

Both of you have cared for me and my brother like your own children, a rarity in these selfish times we are living. You hold the same place as our parents in our hearts.

And it would be so insensitive and wrong on many accounts if here I don’t mention about my sweet little sister, Divya. As a child she used to be our favourite for she used to be super cute and we used to look quite lean (famished wouldn’t be appropriate😂😂). I will always be grateful to God for giving me such a wonderful person as my sister. She is an exact replica of Babai when it comes to emotions. The way she cares for people and bonds, so invested in them wholeheartedly I have never seen anyone else in this practical world. I have a great camaraderie with her and my brother. Summer vacations, late night talks under star lit sky, silly fights, sharing clothes, dancing till we dropped, watching movies in the front row of cinema hall, keeping secrets, breaking down, building up each other – I can literally go on. Technically we were in nuclear families but literally we grew up together (with and on each other). Thank you is a small word for the support you have been to me.

I may not have vast materialistic fortunes but very fortunate to have you in my life, it’s a blessing to have such a loving family, wonderful strong people guiding me at every step, shaping up the right ideology to look at life in a positive perspective, heaping up treasure of memories. Though I don’t like to repeat myself but can’t help today – can never thank you all enough.

Yours lovingly,

Daughter .

Attention, affection and gratitude
are the three fuels that energise positive human behaviour.

LOOKS PINK! GOD’S GRACE!

A highly extrovert and expressive person like me will always have many people to thank to, many people to learn from, and many events to describe, unlike others who might feel shy and have very specific and little to say about their lives.

When I came to Kolkata in 2001, I learned to say ‘Thank You’. Before it was never a habit to say ‘Thank You’. In India, people have a mindset that close relatives and friends should not say ‘Thank You’ or ‘Sorry’ for small things. I don’t understand the funda behind it. Sometimes even I feel weird when somebody shows their gratitude towards me so much for what little I did for him or her.

Oh! Probably that was my utter humility… 😉

Khristina, Anupam, Rajnandini, Sulagna and Prabhjot have been with me for a long time since I gave birth to my baby ‘Candles’. Yes, their names were mentioned sequence wise. But Rajnandini and Prabhjot were more regular and committed.

I love both of them deeply for their hearts and minds and involvements in whatever I thought, whatever I planned and whatever I wanted to deliver through Candles. Trust me, without these two I would not have proceeded this far. They became my two wings to fly high to burn the Candles as much as possible.

I thank them for their commitment and involvement with me in Candles.

If I look back to my childhood, I find few people, ‘Special People…’ who are so worthy to be applauded and thanked.

When I got sick terribly in 1983, my Nanaji (Maternal Grand Dad) brought me to his house in Cuttack. Since then I stayed away from my parents as my maternal grandparents took care of me. I was only 7 years old that time. Nana Ji and Nani’s contributions in my life was huge… They became my parents since then till I was graduated. They literally took care of my physical growth. I am so thankful to them for what they did for me.

Next was my eldest aunt (my Mom’s elder sis) who is single till now and stays with my Nani (her Mum) as Nana Ji is no more now. Now this aunt of mine became my teacher, my guide and my mentor. She was a teacher in a school and when Nana Ji was hesitant to allow me to study because of my health conditions she was the one who took responsibility for my education. I was admitted to the school directly in 4th grade… that’s a world record. 😉

I used to go to school with her and come back with her. My entire schooling was done under her super supervision. She later had borne all my expenses relieving Nanaji. I was graduated from college and went to Bhubaneswar for my post graduation, and all these could happen because of my aunt. I am really grateful for her and her life. Everybody says, ‘God kept her single to mother Chiradeep.’ Probably that’s absolutely right.

In Bhubaneswar, my Badabapa & Badamaa (Dad’s elder brother and his wife) took care of me from 1997-1999 during my post graduation.  I am really thankful to them as well though my beloved Badamaa is no more amidst us. She was such an amicable and soft hearted lady. I miss her softness so much.

During my college days, my friend Binod Sharma was there to pick up from my home to college and drop me back at home. He used to stand in the line for me on the counter. He was an angel for me during my most difficult times. I had already written about this in one of my article published previously HERE on this site.

When I came to Kolkata one of my Mama (Mom’s cousin brother) became my local guardian who’s still live in the same complex/campus. I am thankful to him as well for what he has been doing for me till now.

I am also grateful to my doctor brother who is always beside me since 2003, and all know how easy it becomes when a doctor in a hospital is your relative.

I remember something which I want to mention here as well…

My first surgery was done in 1978 in by Dr Stanley John and my second surgery was done in 2001 by Dr Colin John.

Do you know both are brothers? Dr Stanley John was elder among them. I was too small to remember anything during my first surgery, but during my second surgery, Dr. Colin John remarked that my condition was very critical and you all pray as I operate. After operating me, he told my uncle who was the contact person for me in the hospital that, “I thanked God when I tore open his chest… it was in a fantastic shape… his lungs were functioning well, and we did the surgery successfully.” After 5 years of surgery when I met him again, he smiled and said from far as he was walking down towards me, “What Mr Patra you are looking absolutely fine…” And in his report, he wrote: “Pantop BD Glenn – Looks Pink! God’s Grace!” (BD Glenn is the surgery done on me). I have attached my scanned report as under:

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I thank those two brothers who did these two heart surgeries, and I am living…

Why I am telling all these? Why I am making a fuss about all these life stories and people in my life?

Because I want to thank HIM who kept all these angels on this earth at the right time and tight places of my life ready to be with me, pamper me, take care of me, do the surgeries, being with me in my hard times, taking care of my body, my mind, and my spiritual growth… Finally, HE brought the best angel in my life in the form of my wife about whom I had already spoken a couple of days ago… You can find that HERE.

It is HE who comforted me when I was shooting questions at HIM, “Why did you create me like this?” “What have I done to suffer all my life?” It was He who kept consoling me when I was depressed and sad. It was HE who kept on cleansing me from all my iniquities which I committed in the name of my loneliness, sickness and vulnerability.

I am always asked ‘how could you show care and love to so many people…’, “how do you manage all this…’ Again I would thank my Jesus who showed me how to love people. He soaked me so much with His love, and it is overflowing from my heart which I love to give away to others unconditionally. It was Jesus who loved me when I was an enemy to Him before I accepted Him in my heart. That transformed my mind, my heart and my life. It was easy for me to give love. I am really grateful to Him for loving me…

It is He who is worthy of all my heartfelt gratitude.

Friends! Never take your loved ones for granted… Never take God for granted… Don’t forget to thank them and Him ever…

Stay Blessed!!!

 

 

HUSBANDS! HAVE YOU THANKED YOUR WIVES?

“In my opinion a homemaker is a woman who balances every work that she finds in front of her so perfectly that others won’t get a trace of it.”

That’s what I think about my wife… she is a perfect homemaker that way.

It was in the year 2012 March 8th on the occasion of International Women’s Day I got an opportunity to write about my wife thanking her on a different and bigger platform, “Yahoo Magazine”. I am grateful to my cousin and co-writer Khristina for giving me the information and helping me to publishing it on Yahoo. But now that article was moved to some other sites where you can view it HERE.

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Asmita, my wife

Apart from just being a great homemaker I would like to thank her for so many other things that are always go unnoticed. I wanted to highlight few of her actions behind the screen which I had mentioned in another article few months ago. I have quoted it as under:

The unending prayer pleas by my bedside when I am sick; the unspoken and the inexpressible heartaches because of my physical inabilities and weaknesses; the struggles of unwanted night – watching for my discomfort; the pain of carrying out undesired burdens of extra responsibilities; the display of forced smiles to manage the relationships and situations in the midst of taunts from loved ones. The list can be longer if I think and write more about her role, contributions and investments in my life as well as towards out marriage.

All she goes through are for me; to complete me, to manage me, to support me in life…

Adding to the above list if I expand it a bit more then I would like to thank her for trusting me for everything though sometimes I had accused her for not trusting me fully. I would like to thank her for my inspiration. Why did I say that… ‘my inspiration’? Even she won’t like it if she reads this… because she thinks she doesn’t have anything, any quality which can inspire any other person. But I would say she let me explore myself… Explore myself as a music composer. I knew I can write… but I never knew I could compose music… It was because she sings very well I thought of trying out to compose one or two songs… It clicked. I am really grateful to God and to my wife for finding myself as a music composer.

My friend Kuljeet commented yesterday in our group chat: “This Thank You week is turning out to be really great.. whenever I read the latest article I feel I can relate to it and my mind goes Yeah I too am thankful for this relationship… In our daily routine we take a lot of people in our life for granted. Thanks guys for reminding me that I am thankful for the presence of so many people and relations in my life…”

She was right… we read articles on being grateful to a Husband, a Brother in Law, a Grand Father, Friends, a Help-maid, a Mom, a Teacher, a Daughter and a Brother till now… and it was my turn to thank a Wife … Of course my wife, Asmita.  I am grateful to God for allowing me in her life.

Always be grateful for everything in life to God and to the people around you…

Stay Blessed!!!

THANK YOU… MY PRECIOUS!

whatsapp-image-2016-12-05-at-3-51-11-pm“Is that your daughter? She is such a sweet thing to watch. I have been watching her the entire service, and she made my day. She took away all my pains and tensions. She gave me peace. Thank you for bringing her to this service. I hope to see her always.” said a stranger to me at church one day! What did she do??? She was just one n half that time, and she stood looking and smiling at everyone who looked at her. That day she taught me that a simple smile and light up a dark surrounding as was for the stranger.

3 years ago, I had problems and went to see the doctor. She examined me saying I have multiple cysts and i cannot bear child ever. I and my husband came back home with tensions and sorrows in our hearts. Both silent and not being able to speak. And then suddenly he said, “Let’s ask the prayer warriors to pray.” We went, and prayed there. A prayer warrior told us to put both our hands on my stomach and pray every night before we sleep. I took medicines for 3 months and then we went home for Christmas. All my relatives (including our parents, unknown of my situation) told us that its high time for a baby. We would smile and say, ” We have left it on God”. We came back and then at last in the month of March I told my mother with a lot of disappointment, “Wait! Why are you in such a rush?”. And we prayed and prayed. My health deteriorated suddenly and I would feel so rusty from within. On Good Friday, after church, my husband said, lets go for a check up. And we went. And lo, we found out that I was 2 months pregnant already. How wonderful was that!!! Miracles do happen. And for us, she was our first and greatest miracle and a gift!

whatsapp-image-2016-12-05-at-3-51-09-pmShe has taught me many more things. Most importantly, how to be a mother. She has been a constant teacher to me, where she has never left me. Mommy to a 2 year old now, I have been through many situations and paths, both happy and sad, where she has always been there. The small span of 2 years with my cutie hasn’t only been wonderful but more of a roller coaster ride. I haven’t ever verbally said her thanks, not that she will understand! But, when I pray I constantly thank God for giving her as my daughter. I, at times feel that I am so not worth her. Times I hit her for any reason, times I scold her, times I say no to some unwanted things which she wants, it pains and breaks me from within. Still being strong and making her do something else has been hard. I have also learnt the art of sacrifice to the utmost extent. My morning starts with her and my night ends with her. Days are there when I hardly get time for loo. But I have learnt that she is more important that myself. Maybe some wouldn’t agree, but this is how a mother’s heart feels.

whatsapp-image-2016-12-05-at-3-51-08-pmIts not only in my case. But all mothers in the whole wide world feel the same. We tend to share the same feelings of utter happiness, sorrow, eagerness, tension and pain. And we have learnt to carry them all together doing all the house chores and still managing to smile making the day better for everyone. That smile is possible because of the blessings in our lives – Kid(s). So here am I, thanking my daughter for helping me go through so many situations and helping me stand strong – helping me protect her and cover her from harm, making me stronger only – for helping me understand signs and ways of life. For being able to be in constant touch with God, praying for her and her well being, only taking me more and more closer to him. Thank you my baby for all these. I know a day will come when I can tell you all these and you will understand. Till then its your Mummy and all her feelings for you only.whatsapp-image-2016-12-05-at-3-51-06-pm

She is my love, my life and my heartbeat. There are times when I do express and many a times I don’t. But this is what she is and will remain for ever. My first born, the greatest gift of God to me.

THANK YOU TEACHER

Hello Everyone,

It’s the teacher that makes the difference, not the classroom. – Michael Morpurgo

Teacher – the only person in this otherwise selfish world who is genuinely happy to see you succeed other than your parents.

Teacher – a person who could gift a person with personality by imparting knowledge above and beyond the syllabus and books.

But in the wake of commercialisation of education teaching is deemed to be a mere profession and the role of a teacher is slowly limiting itself within the boundary walls of school and contribution is assessed only numerically (read ranks).  In such a scenario can a teacher be referred as revered?

But today I am not here to get into the discussion how holistic teaching and teacher should be, what should be the professional ethics☺

I want to take this opportunity on this platform to thank my teachers.  I am very fortunate in this lifetime to have amassed love and faith of my teachers throughout.   Any examination be it academic or otherwise they taught me to face it with head high.  I am thankful to them to have made me inculcate the habit of owning up one’s mistake.

As a child I used to be an asthma patient.  Every fortnight I used to be absent from school.  But my class teacher, Mrs.Sandhya, was very compassionate, she used to arrange all the important notes for me to ensure that I don’t miss any important lesson.  Even in the class she made sure that I am comfortable when I used to return after my illness.  I could never ever be able to thank her enough for the care she took like a mother away from home.

Another person from teaching fraternity whom I want to thank for her contribution in making me what I am is Mrs. Jyoti, my English teacher in secondary school.  She is the one who taught me about leading – be it a group or own life, until charge is taken, read responsibility, it is not right to expect results.  And till date I abide by that.

In fact every teacher of mine have influenced my life and moulded my thought process in some or other way.  But today I want the world to know about this particular incident and incidentally thank my teacher.

It was in 2004, results of my graduation first year were announced.  I did well.  Very next moment I got notice that I am supposed to pay fees for next academic session within a week.  I was in a fix, not because the amount was higher (hardly few thousands, 4K to be precise) but as a family we were in serious financial crunch.  My father was in double mind whether I shall I continue my graduation in college or not, so was I.  I don’t want to blame him and I can’t, it was the need of the hour.  But somehow my professor in college Mr. E. Muralidhar Rao, got to know about my dilemma.  He called me and right away gave me the sum for college fees.  I was reluctant to accept that but he insisted and told me that ” a sincere student like you should never discontinue studies just for the lack of funds.  All your efforts and focus should be directed towards your studies”.  My eyesight blurred with tears.  How could I thank him for being so generous.  And it’s not just for the sum he arranged, I want to thank him for two valuable lessons he gave me:

  • If ever you are in a position to help someone never hesitate especially if you could help someone with their education.  Education is a tool to reduce disparities in the society.
  • Always be humble:  I have seen him like that for the learned person he was, I have never seen him raising his voice or boasting about self.

No words in any language would ever be able to explain what is your importance in my life as a human being.  I am thankful to God for gifting me this fortune of learning from revered teachers, Guru in true sense.

Thank you Teacher.

GRATITUDE IS COOL!

“Precious mummy,

Thank you for your unconditional love and care for me from the time when I was in your womb. Thank you for enduring all the pain I gave you, yet holding on to them as if they are your most precious jewel. Thank you for the uncountable sacrifices you made without a word of complaint. When you were down with fever, you chose to work with the meager strength that you had, just to keep us healthy. Through the hard times, you didn’t give up!

Thank you for standing up for me in my hard times, for protecting me like a guardian angel, for running this race of life along with me and picking me up whenever I surrendered before the finish line. Thank you for the wonderful knowledge you bestowed upon me. You taught me to take all my problems to the One Above before taking them to the mortals. You taught me to have Faith – a faith that conquers all fear. You taught me there is more joy in giving than in receiving. You have helped me learn my values for life!

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My Mom & Me

Thank you for everything, dear mummy. I may never have thanked you before because it is in the blood of man to take certain people and things for granted. But I want to thank you with everything I have and with all that I am today. You are the greatest blessing God can give to a child! You are my tranquility and my turmoil and everything in between! You’re my world!  You‘re my mummy!”

 We are so busy running this race of life that we often forget who actually got us here. We thank everyone who comes in our path but become oblivious to show our gratitude to the one who helped us begin this journey. As I have mentioned earlier that it is in the blood of man to take things for granted. What if we become the victims of ingratitude? How would that make us feel? Miserable obviously! An effort which is unappreciated suffers a silent torturous death. 

So let us break free of this unpleasing attitude which binds us from a humble confession of ‘thank you’. No, attitude is not cool, gratitude is! Thank people whenever you can and let it not just be in words but in actions as well. Gratitude is cool! Gratitude is amazing! Gratitude can save relationships!