NO ONE IS BEST BUT ME

The Merriam-Webster dictionary defines ‘haughty‘ as being blatantly or disdainfully proud or which in simple terms mean having or showing the insulting attitude of people who think that they are better, smarter or more important than other people.

No doubt being haughty or rather having haughty eyes is considered to be one among the seven things hated by Lord Almighty. The eyes are the mirror to the heart. It is believed that if one looks into the eyes the mechanisms of the heart could be understood. So it also means, if a person has haughty eyes, the overall attitude of his heart is to look down upon and scorn others.

Now this is something we really don’t want to encounter. Haughtiness or pride is spontaneous and this gives rise to a host of other sins.

What causes a person to be haughty?

Friends, it can be anything one does best or a possession but the biggest thing that triggers haughtiness is a consideration that ‘I am above all’. A haughty person acknowledges less and attributes his blessings, his successes all to himself. A feeling that ‘no one is best but me’ empowers the heart of a haughty person. He or she doesn’t think for a second time to lie, shed innocent blood and spread violence. All this is done only to be at the top.

The scriptures speak about such people who wanted to be at the top. Lucifer, Nimrod, Belshazzar, King Saul were among them. The result of such arrogance is nothing but downfall.

The philosophy behind terrorism is haughtiness. Certain people are proud of the way they profess their love for their religion. Professing love for God without humility is not righteousness.

Haughtiness only leads to downfall as the person is concerned with gathering treasures of the Earth which is passing away.

The real treasure lies in not staying at the top but acknowledging the Most High and in building relationships of a healthy kind with your fellow beings in encouragement and motivation.

Now that’s called making a difference.

WHY DON’T YOU JUST FLIP THE COIN?

A coin has two sides. And we always look at the side facing us and not the other.

Its a weird sentence to start with. But though we live in a simple world its our own emotions that complicate everything around. As much as we appear to be sensible and confident there is always that insecurity and vulnerability that is seeded deep within us and we cannot shake it off. It’s a feeling that never goes away. It is this deep rooted feeling that gives birth to our ugly side. The façade that we put on for the world to see. The arrogance, the ego, the pride , the vanity… All to  keep the world at bay, so that nobody peers close enough to look at how utterly lost you.

How unbelievable beat down you feel. The haughty eyes hide the fear underneath that if we show our real self we won’t be accepted for who we are, that we will be mocked and be called weak or naive. So we do the same to everybody around. We mock them, judge them. Because how dare they… how dare they have the guts to do what we failed at…?

So like I said, two sides of the same coin. Two stories of the same person. One arrogant and the other  lost. One proud and the other insecure. One egoistic and the other vulnerable. Simple life but complicated beings.

So food for your thoughts is how much better would it be if we just drop the act… Wouldn’t the world be a better place if we just flip the coin and show what we are really made of…? ‘A Scared bunch of people with a good heart and kind soul…!’

HAUGHTINESS OR HUMILITY – WHAT DO YOUR EYES REFLECT?

OUR EYES SPEAK

It is said that – ‘Eyes are the windows to the soul.’ So very true! Our eyes are one of the means via which we communicate non-verbally. They convey even more than our spoken words. Even when a person doesn’t utter a word, the expressions of his / her eyes speak volumes. Through the gestures of our eyes we communicate and also perceive the intents of the communication we receive from others. Eyes not only collect information from the outer world but also convey feelings and emotions. A gaze or a stare, the amount of eye movement, the dilation or expansion of the pupils are effective ways of conveying and perceiving conveyed information. And so, we have the innocent look, the naughty look, the sad look, the mischievous look, the angry look, the seductive look, the dangerous look and so on.

UNDERSTANDING THE HAUGHTY LOOK

This article deals with the ‘haughty look’. To explain simply, ‘haughty’ means ‘arrogant’ – bragging too much about oneself or showing oneself bigger and better than others. Haughtiness is a negative attribute of the heart. A person who is too proud of his / her intellect, wealth, accomplishments, looks, power, etc. is said to be haughty. A haughty person thinks and acts superior and looks down on others. To give examples – making fun of others and speaking in a cocky way when they are not aware of the new brand of mobiles that have been launched makes me haughty. To show off my accomplishments and boast of my degrees to prove that I’m more learned than others makes me haughty. To constantly boast of my looks and beauty in a way that pushes others to be ashamed of theirs makes me haughty. And yes, to show myself as too righteous and spiritual over and above others also makes me haughty!

When we refer to ‘haughty eyes’, we basically refer to pride in the heart which is conveyed through the gestures of our eyes. And so what we are looking at here is essentially an attitude of arrogance. Arrogance does not indicate confidence, as many may want to believe. Rather it is a reflection of insecurity and a fragile self-esteem deep within the individual.

HOW DOES HAUGHTINESS MANIFEST ITSELF?

When a baby is born, he / she perceives the world to be revolving around himself / herself. This is true to a great extent as everyone is fussy about the infant’s arrival. Infants generally outgrow this trait of egocentrism as they increase in age. However, the continual presence of egocentrism even in the adult years is perceived as haughtiness. Haughtiness is a negative character trait.

A haughty spirit emerges from a deep-rooted desire to cover up our shortcomings, to hide our fears, to protect our weaknesses from coming to the limelight by exalting certain other traits in a greater-than-life manner. A haughty spirit finds manifestation in the way we look at others. Have you ever been in a position where someone looked at you from top to bottom and either turned away their faces or gave a nasty expression? This is the work of haughty eyes. You couldn’t really understand the reason behind it, you thought there was nothing wrong about you and you deserved nothing of the sort. Perhaps you were hurt or you ignored the whole episode or decided to pay back to the person at an appropriate time!

REPLACE YOUR HAUGHTY EYES WITH HUMBLE EYES

Just as we would feel belittled by the haughty looks of others, our haughty eyes also have the potential to rob others of their self-esteem. The Bible tells thus – “Let someone else praise you and not your own mouth; an outsider and not your own lips.” When I praise myself and speak too highly of myself, I prepare the ground for a haughty spirit which is further manifested in my haughty looks. Haughty eyes are detestable in the sight of God. Our eyes are meant to express love and compassion for others – to build others and not break them.

Humility in spirit leaves no space for haughty eyes. When we accept our weaknesses with humility, we will rejoice over our strengths with the same humility. We all are designed uniquely and blessed differently. And so, it is for us to appreciate the goodness in others and lift them up.

We need not be like the egocentric infant, wanting to gloss over our own selves all the time. Let our eyes speak the language of a heart that overflows with humility. Eyes loaded with humility have a strange magnetic power in them which attract others, whereas haughty eyes repel. Those who humble themselves will find themselves exalted in due time. That’s the secret of success!

Author’s Bio: Rajnandini Sahu has done her Post Graduation in Clinical and Counselling Psychology and is presently working as a Counsellor in a school, apart from pursuing higher studies. She can be contacted at ‘rsahu1023@gmail.com‘.