WHAT MATTERS AND WHAT DOESN’T

Just like any other individual, I have had my own highs and lows in life. If I analyze my phases, I can feel that most of what I have experienced can be attributed to my emotional dependency on people and the environment. Thus these internal fluctuations with regard to the good and the bad times always cause big turbulence, leading to mental havoc and wasteful thinking. From a very recent incident, I was able to recall the advice of my spiritual guide over a telephonic conversation with him, that I had forgotten amid the helter-skelter of my B-school life.

I just complained to him about people’s sympathetic and weird reactions to my auto-immune disorder which flared up on my skin at different parts in hundreds of minuscule patches uninvitedly a couple of months back. When I was finished with my rants, he asked me if it is affecting me physically or causing any harm, pain or injury. Since it just has to do with the outer skin, it actually makes no impact on my lifestyle, except the fact that I become a little conscious in my choice of clothing. On hearing this, he laughed off my problem and told me, that the problem is not with the disorder but with the way I am getting affected by people’s reactions to it. And, so he reminded me of the old advice he had given me way back in a different context that still holds true which goes like:-
“I shouldn’t be affected by what others think or say about me but what matters is what I think and say about them. ”

It might sound unconditional but it certainly changes the perception and our reactions towards people with whose opinions, we fluctuate. Stating my own experience, I no longer feel frustrated with people’s reactions but I have turned empathetic to understand their level of unawareness about the disorder. Sometimes, I feel the need to explain to them about my condition and how it will vanish soon, while most of the time, I take a silent and composed stand now, for I am actually not responsible to justify. My teacher very easily tells me to simply name the problem and leave it for people to google rather than explaining them the nuances of it. And, so at times, I listen to their fuss about it, their opinions and advice about it but don’t take it by heart. My anger for them has turned into pity and sympathy especially for those persons who judge others by external appearance. Now, I give them a smile and empathize with them for believing and falling for temporal things.  Being mindful, I make sure that I create no negative thoughts but emit positive vibrations only for such people as ultimately it will affect my inner energies and I can heal soon both internally and externally. It is only through my teacher’s advice that I have been able to develop strong immunity against others’ comments and have been able to develop a positive outlook towards life. I need not mention but it actually makes me stronger and carefree.

LIFE IS LIKE AN EXAM – THEN WHY MANY FAIL?

Let us first understand – why life is an exam?

Is it really an Exam?

Who is judging you?

Do you have any say on this?

It is true that life is challenging, but we all have different challenges to deal with. I might not be dealing with what you have, neither you will be dealing with what I have to. We all have varying hurdles to live through our daily routine.

We all tend to overlook into others lives, and make our life much more challenging by complaining about what we lack, ignoring what we already possess.

So why do we fail in the exam called life? Ever thought on the same?

There are several reasons, why we fail in life :

  1. We all are scared of failing.
  2. We listen more to others than our innermost desires.
  3. We compare ourselves with the better, assuming that we are just nothing.
  4. We just want to be a copy of others, than being different.

Being Scared of Failing 

If we try, then only we can decide, whether it is fun or not. Without even trying, assuming things to be difficult is the first step of failure. Take life as a challenge that is when you will cherish every moment of it. Wade off the fear of failing and prepare yourself to experience a new you.

Have you ever seen a baby stopping to try to walk, upon falling several times?

It is simply because, the baby is not scared to walk, even when it might fall a couple of times. Success is not an easy thing to achieve.  Growing up, most of us have lost that inquisitiveness in life.

Turning Deaf to the innermost feelings

Taking advice from the wrong is going to lead you into much more trouble. We all tend to take advice from people who do not have a single knowledge of what we do. And finally, even when our heart desires a lot, we just break away from those innermost feelings.

Don’t you think that is the worst part of being in a challenge? 

If you want to make life challenging, challenge the people around you who are stuck in monotony and show them how life can be happier with a choice that glows your heart.

Comparison- The slow poison on life

Even though we all know that we have varied things, aims, desires, dreams, passion, lifestyle everything including habits, we still tend to compare.

Yes, Comparison kills the joy of life.

One may have, a luxurious life but may not be completely happy. At the same time, a poor one may not have the luxury but has a peaceful life. It is all about how you take things. Identifying what you actually need and what makes you sufficient is important.

The moment you realise that you are different from others and you chose to be different, then it is a grand success.

We all even must have encountered several instances wherein parents compare children with other children and forget that their own child possesses something unique. In such cases, the child loses its self-confidence and even fails at many things. Little do they realise that comparing the child to another one, is killing the joy in their life.

Let them be what they want.

We all are Copycats 

We all just try to be a copy of the one near us or known to us. We never try to even change a little bit, because we assume that , something that is being called perfect among us is an epitome to be followed.

Being different is a challenge.

Life throws different challenges to all, and we all try to copy, forgetting that we all have different question papers to solve.

As I was saying, 

Life is an interesting challenge to endure. Making every moment challenging is even much more fun.  The moment we push ourselves outside the glass wall of others’ expectations, we are going to make life interesting.

At least at one point of life,  choose to take up a challenge. It might change your perspective of life.

 

 

LOVE – FORGIVENESS & JUSTICE EMBRACING EACH OTHER IN ONE PICTURE.

In my imaginative visit, I was in the shopping mall with my Dad and I got attracted towards the luxurious bone china made Nymphenburg Adonis dinnerware, as I proceed towards the crystal glass made dinnerware shelf, I thought to hold it and feel the touch but as a result, being a kid I was unable to balance the weight of the serving bowl and it fell from my hand.

The noise of breaking the bowl alarm the salesman, he yelled and took me to the manager. I was fined to pay the cost of the complete dinner set but I am just a kid, even it is impossible for me to have at least 50 bucks in my pocket, how can I pay Rs. 16,100/-.

At that point, my father had to jump into the picture to pay the wages of my mistake. He apologized to the manager, paid for my mistake and took me home. He was unhappy with my action yet he understood my weakness and absurdity.

As we drove back, he just smiled at me and said,

“SON, I EXPECT YOU WILL NOT REPEAT YOUR MISTAKE”.

MY HEART WILL GO ON…

Meera was a dusky, beautiful and introvert girl from a conservative family who was a fresher in Engg college when Manan saw her and fell for her head over heels, not wasting any time to woo her, win her heart, propose to her and persuade her to say yes with his charming looks and flamboyant ways in a way that she fell deeply in love with him.

The four years of college went by in a flurry as good times pass in a blink of an eye but they were the most beautiful four years of Meera’s life as her love and cared for Manan only kept growing manifolds with each passing day and she almost became a shadow to Manan, a point she marked by setting her ringtone to her favourite song “Tu jahaan jahaan chalega, Mera Saaya Saath Hoga…”, something she often hummed for him as she was an old school girl who loved old Hindi movie songs.

They both got placed in different jobs, in different cities and went their ways with promises to stay in touch and meet often but as luck would have it, on the first day of his new job, Manan met Kalandi, an outgoing, stunning fashionista who was a ball of energy and a complete contrast to Meera and Manan couldn’t help but get swept off his feet by her outspoken and candid personality and soon forgot about Meera.

He tried to keep things normal with Meera for first few months but she was quick to sense the change in his words and his tones and Manan knew he wouldn’t be able to hide his disinterest in Meera for long and one fateful day he broke the news of having met Kalandi to Meera who was crestfallen and devastated but keeping her dignity intact hung up the call in tears, never to call Manan again who was indeed quite relieved to have the burden off his chest.

Manan married Kalandi, had a blissful honeymoon in Greece and returned to start his new life with the women of his dreams but the thought of Meera and what he did to her never left him, it was eating him up from inside but he drowned the inner voice of his soul in living a buzzing and high life with Kalandi who knew nothing about Meera and Manan nor bothered to tell her about his affair with Meera neither ever tried to know what became of Meera.

A couple of months later Kalandi fell ill as was admitted to the hospital where she recovered within a week and was discharged soon, but she was no more the same girl whom he married, intact she was becoming more and more like Meera with each passing day and that made Manan restless to the limits that he tried to enquire about Meera finally But was only met with dead ends.

A week later Manan was sitting in a cab on his way to office, already troubled by Kalindi’s behaviour, when he picked a discarded newspaper from the next seat and started reading it when his eyes habitually fell on the obituary section, and him was shocked to see Meera’s obituary who committed suicide a fortnight ago, Manan was overcome by nausea and immediately called Kalandi but the phone fell from his hand on hearing her new caller tune that rang in his ears….

“Tu agar udaas hoga, To udaas hongi Main bhi…
Nazar Aaj ya na aau, Tere paas hongi Main bhi…
Tu Kahin bhi Jaa rahega, Mera saaya saath hoga…
Tu jahaan jahaan chalega, Mera saath saath hoga…”

(Should you ever become sad, then it will make me sad too because I desire to share your sorrow,
Whether you see me or not, I will always stand by you,
Wherever you live where you stay, I will always follow you; I can’t let you feel alone.
Wherever you go my essence shall follow you…)

ONE LAST TIME

He puffed a cigarette and exhaled a circle of smoke hoping to see her on the other side with a pinched nose and her hand waving to break this smoky cloud.

He wanted to hear her say one last time, “Sweeto, I am telling you I will really dump you if you don’t quit smoking.”

But it was too late, she had quit him before he could quit smoking. She had quit this world and vanished into the smoke that rose from the dead.

Life may not give you a second chance. Be good and do good.

DO IT NOW.

SHORTEST LOVE STORY

She had a monotonous life, which she always cursed standing at the bus stop from where she used to board a bus to hell – her office, her 4×4 cubicle which had a lot of commotion sans any emotion.

But that day had a surprise for her, her eyes met another pair of eyes, looking fondly at her from a distance, eyes smiled instantly and lips couldn’t remain unaffected.

And these smiles, glances, gentle gestures soon became a routine for her but she enjoyed this monotony and attention that never greeted her before and now she doesn’t want it to elude her.

Her looks and attire which she never cared for, now mattered to her and she put efforts to impress those eyes now, she was herself amused at this development.

And finally they inched a bit closer, from lovely glances to soft conversations the distance between them narrowed, all smiles, she could hear violins, too cinematic by her own confession but she couldn’t help herself  from getting drawn towards him.

And one day finally he said “you got the most beautiful smile, your eyes speak volumes, I have been waiting to say this to you and I have a question for you – would you mind joining our gym, you just need to lose few pounds, you will look great, we are having a discount period running, what say?”.

This left her stumped, she was in doubt now, “shall I marvel at his promotion genius or shall I fume at him that he indirectly called me fat or shall I nurse my shattered dream or SHALL I JOIN THE GYM?”

THE WORLD OF TRUTH

Meghna was wearing her clothes while listening to Vinod go on and on about the corruption in the country and false promises of the politicians while he was reading the newspaper. She wasn’t interested in participating in the conversation, Meghna and Vinod had just spent a beautiful night together after a lot of acute planning – she just wanted to enjoy the after-effects of it.

Vinod went on and on – “When will the world change, why can’t people just stop telling lies and be straight about who they are? Look what is happening in politics, Bollywood, cricket – there is lying and cheating everywhere.”

Just then Vinod’s phone rang and both of them just froze at their spot, just the look on his face told Meghna that it was Vinod’s wife (Prerna) calling.

Vinod’s tone changed now – “Hi Prerna darling! Of course I missed you, this important business trip made me travel otherwise I would have never left you and gone even for few hours. I had a great presentation last night, will be back home by evening, love you a lot.”