COMPARTMENTALIZING …

This conversation was from a week ago with our dear Charlie. He got a new laptop. Anything new is extremely exciting and he was no different after receiving the laptop. I was asking some casual questions about display, battery etc, when he mentioned he wants to partition the drive. He wanted to call someone so that the drives could be partitioned because he wasn’t sure how to do that. I asked him why he wants to partition because after SSD (Solid State Drive), there is almost no clear advantage of partitioning the drive unless one needs dual boot or really want the data from a particular drive to be backed up. I explained him it wasn’t necessary at all. He snapped back with a question, “Do you partition your laptop drive?”. There was an instant smile on my face. I don’t and I told him the same. That’s when he was really convinced. 

Partitioning itself is a beautiful concept, not for laptops alone but for human beings too. There is a term for it, compartmentalisation. Couple of years ago, someone mentioned to me that they compartmentalise their life. It did not occur to me immediately, but, a while later I realised I compartmentalise too. In fact, all of us compartmentalise life without paying much attention to it. We separate professional life vs personal, best friends vs close friends and many more. 

Our brain is wired in this way to protect us, to allow us to function better in life. The ability to compartmentalize means we can create psychic barriers to protect from the stress of conflicting thoughts. It’s a natural way to play offense. There is a WhatsApp joke that circulated sometime back – An old man refers to his wife always as Darling, Baby etc. When other people express they admire how much the old man loves his wife, he says he actually forgot what his wife’s name is. I have seen many boys not refer to girls with their names. I always wondered if all they wanted was to not mix-up names. Lol.. It is still unanswered, if anyone of you knows the answer, please enlighten me. 

A simple rule of thumb that I follow in life, is to identify the tasks I need to perform and the tasks that make me happy. For example, doing the dishes is my responsibility. However, that does not essentially make me happy. On the other hand, getting a new plant or gardening does make me happy but not an essential task. In life, it is important to draw that line to set aside time. The hardest part of course, is not to let things from these compartments overwhelm you until you are ready to process them together or one along with other. The easy part are the common ones. For example, my career brings me happiness and also is essential for my survival. So, in reality, the only thing I need to keep track of the time I am spending on my career so that I don’t disturb other aspects. 

Of late, due to work from home, many people started to feel that there is no difference between work-life and professional life. Some of my colleagues said that they continue to think about work all the time. A simple hack that might help is to have dedicated spot in your house to work that is not the same place as you sleep. Keep work related items out of your sight if you are really struggling. We have to compartmentalize the various goings on of our own life experience to keep them from disturbing other parts of our life.

There is also an unhealthy compartmentalisation that some do without realising –  Locking their emotions while grieving or trying to cope up with some loss. This form of compartmentalisation leads to distress and often leads to depression. Processing all of it by yourself could be more than you can handle and it is always better to open up to a friend or well-wisher. What kind of compartmentalisation could help here, is to not let this pain bleed to other areas of life. 

After all this, some day we are going to run out of memory. So, just let go of !!!

Compartmentalization is an unconscious psychological defense mechanism employed to avoid cognitive dissonance. – Author: Zack Love

BETWEEN THE DEMON AND THE SLOW POISON

My daughter was watching her favourite cartoon series on YouTube. Suddenly an advertisement popped up. It was a scary one. With demonic figures charging up, roaring at each other and inflicting carnage on everything and everyone, she got scared and came to me. I skipped the ad and consoled her. She gathered herself and asked me, “Mom are demons real?”

I smiled and said “no darling that’s all imagination, demons don’t exist. Don’t get scared” and hugged her tightly and put her to sleep. That night I watched her closely if that advertisement would have an impact on her sleep. Night passed off well and the next day she left to the school happily. Before leaving she posed one question that engaged my thoughts for a very long time. She asked “Mom can imagination yield something so alien or a completely non existing thing? Aren’t demons real?”

I didn’t say anything but smiled and saw her off. But I had an answer so complicated that I believed it would be out of the little girl’s comprehension. Answer was “Yes demons are for real”.

Demons are not the caricatures we see onscreen but they dwell well amidst us and within us, peeping through the cracks in our character. Always on a lookout to unleash themselves upon us, commanding us to submit and surrender ourselves (souls) to the ulterior motives.

With those heavy thoughts the I tapped the phone to check out the news with my morning coffee. I tumbled over different “Viral” materials across the internet, making their way to the news portals. A group of bullies beating a lone person mercilessly; an officer abusing subordinates and general public while misusing the authority bestowed; miscreants ill treating (vis a vis torturing) animals just for fun; both the genders getting harassed on various pretexts while transgenders still getting mocked up to an extent of utter humiliation for just being a part of nature’s scheme and everything ranging from witty to atrocious. A sigh escaped my lips.

More than the brutality of the incidents the silence of spectators busy in capturing the episodes in their phones is quite bone chilling. Demons that we are acquainted with are blood thirsty creatures who thrive on the weakness, sorrow and fear of others. We had a notion that demons are unworldly and against humans. But a bird’s eye view at the times we are living in it is clear that it’s has nothing to do with a certain type of specie. It’s about humanity which is almost incessantly depleting from the human race. To worsen the woes what we are witnessing is an oscillation between apparent demons (driven by greed, lust, anger, ego) and slow poison (the mute spectators who claim to be peace loving and the law abiding people). Between the demons and slow poison, it’s the slow poison that is posing a great threat to humanity as it is gifting away the encouragement for such insidious and horrific plans of scrupulous souls to be put into action. Precisely the slow poison of the thought process called “why get involved” is ushering life into the ideology of “who will dare”. In a way the periphery system to the humanity – our value system is paralysed. We react, regret and forget but don’t act at the very first place. Over the years of evolution we have technically advanced but morally been (still) through a downward spiral. We are somehow habituated to live in a cocoon, a bubble from where we pray – to keep Us / Ourselves safe and happy; from where we have a view of everything happening around us and hope nothing unfortunate lands at our doorstep; from where we certainly talk about the cruelties of the wicked ones but don’t speak against it because we are more or less paralysed by one question “Why Get Involved?“. This illusion that our silence will save us from problems is like believing that we might save ourselves from a wild fire by simply changing our path or keep the catastrophic tornado at bay using an umbrella. Sooner or later we all will get engulfed.

To Sum it upWe are aware and woke but not awake.

Our System is infected – Since we made an incredible and unfathomable amount of technological advancements let us talk in technical terms. Considering the human society as a system say a computer that is connected to the entire ecosystem via peripherals of values and responsibilities. Time and again this system is being attacked by the virus of brutalities and over the years various technicians (leaders/ law makers) through their tireless research enabled a security for the system. Security include laws and regulations, code of conducts. But that has not been able to completely secure the system, in fact over a period of time the defense of the system has been weakened considerably. Reason – corrosion of the peripheral that made the security rather ineffective. But the technicians and the users are still turning their user manuals to find defect. It’s high time that we revive the connections with certifications of “compassion”, “gratitude”, “unity” towards the entire system.

Reboot is thy need of the hour!!

PS: Have you encountered demons or tasted slow poison????

THE SEARCH ENGINE SAGA

Do you know what is Pneumonoultramicroscopicsilicovolcanoconiosis?

Even I didn’t until I searched the web for the longest word in dictionary. Yes, and I am sure you will have googled it too! That’s what we all have been doing in the smartphone era and will continue to do so. 

Search engines proved to be an easy access to all the information, that too on our fingertips. All information here refers to the mass- good or bad, positive or negative. Sometimes we get the result in just the top results, else it is like manually searching for a particular tree bark in the jungles of Amazon. Last year, we all were so paranoid with the new pandemic causing disease that ‘coronavirus’ was the most searched word on Google in 2020, as expected.

As I also mentioned in my old article, “When In Doubt, Just Google”, getting information about a particular thing is easy and can be misleading also. When I was expecting my first child, I got chickenpox, that too for the first time in my life. The doctor told me not to worry, yet I searched all over the internet about what all negative effects it can have on the foetus, getting all the more anxious and restless. “Stop searching the net”, my brother warned me as he explained that whatever information the search engines have are given by the users only, citing that if he had a headache after eating sweets, he would mention it on any XYZ website and when a person like me would come across, he/she will believe that if I eat sweets, I will get a headache.

I recently gifted a dictionary to my 9-year-old, as I realised that I was setting up a bad example of using the search engines too often. ‘Creative search’, using your mind is better than an ‘easy search’. So, now if you hit that search button, just pause and think if it’s really needed or not.

WHEN LIFE HANGS FOR SOMETIME

We all have experienced the gruesome waiting time when our computer hangs or freezes. Haven’t we thought of throwing our system in the gutter or kicking it off our table? How many times we have banged our working table in sheer impatience? How many times we have pressed the reset or reboot button to restart our pending work? How many times we felt apprehensive about losing our unsaved data when when the system doesn’t respond to our cries and pleas?

Similarly, we all hate it when everything ceases to work momentarily, obstructing our smooth functioning lifestyle – household or work. We really feel frustrated when we know what is to be done yet we are unable to move ahead. We feel as if our life has frozen or hung for sometime and we are unable to move ahead. It is a horrible experience.

The year 2020-2021 was a deadly year for me. There were problems after problems from all sides, pressing me down and forcing me to succumb to my vulnerabilities. Starting from the hospitalization for Pneumonia in the month of February 2020 till the time I suffered with second episode of hemoptysis (spitting of blood) in February 2021, I remained weak, sick and extremely vulnerable. Moreover, the deaths of relatives and friends and the fear of getting infected with Corona virus myself was all the more stressful and depressing. Added to my problem there was my inability to go to the office, work for long hours or efficiently and the taunts and scolding of insensitive people around me were all very heavy for me.

I felt literally hung in my life – unable to decide or move ahead.

Unfortunately, we humans don’t have a restart or reboot button like computers and mobiles have to get rid of the state of being frozen or hung in the middle of a serious work or life issue.

When I faced with newer health complications, I decided to quit my job but when to do it, how to do it, I didn’t have any idea. There were a lot of obstructions and hurdles to cross before I just called it a quit as we all know winding up is not an easy thing in any manner. And I didn’t want to end things on a bad note. I have always wanted and believed in building relationships; breaking them is something indigestible for me. There were many inputs from my well wishers all around me – whispering to do this and do that, but I remained quiet and held on to my resilience and patience.

I patiently waited on the Lord and His timing, trusting the promise – He says, “Be still, and know that I am God“. Knowing God personally, knowing His heart and knowing what He can do is such a soothing and comforting feel. I was so troubled yet I was so peaceful in Him. And when His appointed time came, He prompted me to press on the reset (quick and quit action) button. Now, I am free, relieved and happy at home, writing this article. 🙂

Am I free from problems? Are all the problems gone? NO, not at all. I have more complications for my blood and cardiac issues, I need to arrange finance for my living, I need engagements to keep my mind occupied, I need this and that to stay alive in real sense before I am called home. But you won’t believe how happy and jubilant I am being here at home without the stress of life.

Friends! Remember, when life hangs or freezes in the middle, stay still and know that He is God. Be patient to get back to your active life instead pressing many other panic buttons and suffer.

Stay Blessed!

TAILORED FITTING

I cut the norms,
a shortie me;
was drowning in it

The gossips,
I made it sleeveless,
was not in its favour of doing the rounds

My ego,
I made it backless;
didn’t want it getting the support of the wall & creeping all over

My self-respect,
I made it ankle length;
wanted it to pick up & run, should anyone try to mangle it

I put on a baggy smile,
that way, it would be easier for my sorrows to be swallowed

I’ve assembled the pieces
to a perfect fit,
I hope you all do too.
Happy tailoring 😊

LET’S DELETE THE CURSE

Each child cries to go to school,
Wants to study for future goal.
Parents are circumstances-bound,
Not a single way can be found.

Though the situations are bit worse,
Cries of stomach shows time coarse.
He never stops himself from dreaming,
nor left behind from the new beginning.

Starts working for his daily chore,
To connect with his painful hunger.
At the tender age, starts labouring,
As a bread earner, the duty is carrying.

Age of study,dance, drama and dreams,
He is cleaning the dirty leftover utensils.
The hunger of the poor’s life is so awful,
Child labour starts like this, there’s no rule.

It should be now stopped by the society,
Little child is tortured all time,it’s the reality.
Enter to the world of education and liberation,
Erase the feel of suppression & add motivation.

Child labour is a curse, but the child is a gift,
Let’s delete the curse and give children a little up shift.
Make each child be adored like our own,
Give them wings, knowing the future unknown.

BANE OR BOON

I sit, and I type
Byte by Byte
My processor is slow
I got nothing to show

My memory is full
I’m trying to pull
Motherboard is outdated
All content is R rated

I empty Drive D
But all I can see
Are files I don’t need
It’s slowing my speed

My head has no space.
Says my Database
I look for the source code
to share some of the load

My heart is a brute
I have to reboot
I run such a risk
of burning my disc

I am run over by Malware.
I wish someone would care
Please unzip my smiles
Add happy chip to my files

If life had a solution
like screen resolution
Just change some setting
and see what you’re getting

I search, and I browse
For my perfect spouse
But this firewall
I should uninstall

The bugs are still here.
The cookies gimme scare
And Captcha onslaught
prove I’m no robot

I need my domain
Plus unique username
A name to standout
on Insta and Hangout

View live in the Zoom
And Friends in chatroom
All smileys no smile
Can’t open this file

Turn to PDF to DOC
And close that CAPSLOCK
No emotions are spared
By emoticon software

This new virtual land
of bandwidth broadband
I wait and watch while life is buffering
Can’t say if its fun or am I suffering