Quote of the day

Good understanding and trust is what a healthy relationship requires.


Quote of the day

I cheer myself up and let my heart soar up high above the sky in love.

Quote of the day

The pure and genuine emotions experienced in love is enough to fill one’s empty heart with abundant peace and comfort.

Quote of the Day

I won’t like to suffocate myself with the hidden feelings and expressions.

Rather I would breath it all out and feel the warmth of it.

 

(Featured Picture sketched by Vipra Madaan)

LOVE YOUR ENEMIES ON VALENTINE’S DAY

“But love your enemies, do good to them, and lend to them without expecting to get anything back. Then your reward will be great, and you will be children of the Most High, because he is kind to the ungrateful and wicked.”

This scripture portion always makes me think, ‘How can I reach the standard of love?’ It seems so daunting and simply impossible.

“Who can forgive his/her enemies…?” No… I think the commandment is asking little more from us. “Who can forgive his/her enemies and love him or her?”

If we observe or celebrate ‘Love’ on Valentine’s day setting that kind of standard then its worth celebrating it or it is just waste of time and money.

Stay blessed!!!

“CLEAVING” IS THE SECRET OF OUR MARRIAGE

A deep marriage relationship is impossible without “CLEAVING”. Many marriage break downs were due to lack of cleaving between the spouses. But what does this word cleaving means? How do we cleave to our spouse? What is the process of cleaving? Let’s see.

The literal meaning of ‘cleave’ is ‘stick to like glue’ as the dictionary describes. In the Bible there is a Hebrew word for cleave is DABAQ. This word DABAQ has been used to define ‘holding tight in love’, ‘remaining loyal in adverse situations’, ‘remaining faithful & being committed to each other always’.

Thus, cleaving means –

– Physical, mental, emotional & spiritual bonding or sticking together in love, care & understanding

– Standing tight to each other when facing financial, familial, educational, or any other problems

– Being faithful & committed to each other even if there are temptations in front of us, rumours against spouses, conspiracy etc.

– Making every decisions together in one mind, in one accord

Today’s marital relationships lack ‘cleaving’ for which there are so many divorces, separations and marital break-ups. Cleaving (love, loyalty & commitment) does not depend on anybody’s feelings but that’s the basis of a marriage relationship.

Though I knew about CLEAVING before but learning about it afresh and renewing my mind & my emotions towards my spouse while sitting beside her was something different, special, interesting and exciting. We both were reminded about the basis of our marriage which was really very important though we were committed to each other till now.

This was a great learning for me and my wife, so thought of sharing it with you all.

Stay Blessed!

WAVE OF MARRIAGE

Before I got married, I often heard my colleagues talking about their spouses and usually joking about how love disappears after a couple of years of marriage. I often heard that once honeymoon period is gone, all the excitement of marriage is also gone. I was eager to find out why this really happens.

Then in 2010 I got married to my college sweetheart. And it was all beautiful in the beginning few months. As we approached our first anniversary, misunderstandings had started to creep in. The reality of living together dawned on us. Earlier we used to meet once in a while and used to give our full attention to each other in those few hours or even days. Now living together months went past and we hardly gave each other our full attention. And then came a period of darkest time in our relationship. Once we crossed that, our relationship seem to stabilize. Of course, both of us made efforts towards it – but it was that one dark period that we had to just hold on.

After 5 years of being married I have realized that marital relationship is much like a “Damped Sine Wave”. A Sine wave is the one that oscillates between highest high and lowest low and a damped sine wave reduces the intensity of highest high and lowest low with time.

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A marriage always starts at the highest point of happiness and togetherness. It is all fancy and beautiful then. With time the happiness goes down and down and it reaches the lowest low ever. This is time when you really have to hold on. Most of the divorces and breakups happen at this point. If you somehow manage to cross it, you again get a high but it won’t be as high as the previous – and there will be a low again which won’t be as low as the previous one. And with time highs and lows becomes almost a single line of stability.

When I look at my parents, I know that they have achieved that stable line since a long time. They love each other yet they have their own disagreements. They have figured out how to respect one another without judgmental attitude.

So, where do you think your marriage is? If it is in one of the lows – just hold on and stick together, there is bound to be a high. If it is one of the highs – make most of it so that it is easier to pass the next low. And as you will grow older together, you will get more and more stabilized.