WHAT IS ARROGANCE & WHAT IT CAN DO TO A PERSON? WHAT THE GREAT PEOPLE SAY ABOUT IT?

Finally, we came to the end of another fruitful week discussing about pride and arrogance. Though the size of readers is less this week but we did have some good write-ups posted throughout. 

All the previous articles can be found HERE together starting from the Mega Article to Final Words.

Tonight, I am bit arrogant to write anything on arrogance… Lol 😉

But actually I don’t want to talk about it when the great people and the people around the world have spoken so much about arrogance. I have mentioned them as follows:

“You never really learn much from hearing yourself speak.”  George Clooney

“Arrogance is a creature. It does not have senses.
It has only a sharp tongue and the pointing finger.”  Toba Beta

There are two kinds of pride, both good and bad. ‘Good pride’ represents our dignity and self-respect. ‘Bad pride’ is the deadly sin of superiority that reeks of conceit and arrogance.” ― John C. Maxwell

Arrogance, ignorance, and incompetence. Not a pretty cocktail of personality traits in the best of situations. No sirree. Not a pretty cocktail in an office-mate and not a pretty cocktail in a head of state. In fact, in a leader, it’s a lethal cocktail.”  Graydon Carter

Nobody can be so amusingly arrogant as a young man who has just discovered an old idea and thinks it is his own.”  Sydney J. Harris

Love measures our stature: the more we love, the bigger we are. There is no smaller package in all the world than that of a man all wrapped up in himself.”  William Sloane Coffin

He was like a cock who thought the sun had risen to hear him crow.”  George Eliot

The last quote by George Eliot was my favourite from the lot above. What arrogance can do to the people, we really can’t imagine. Is there any comparison between a cock and the sun? Yet, arrogance made the cock to think that the sun rises to hear it crow. Funny, isn’t it?

Friends, keep reading, keep pondering on these articles, snippets and quotes…

Stay Blessed!

(Quotes are collected from  - http://www.wisdomquotes.com, 
http://www.goodreads.com & http://www.brainyquote.com) 

WHAT IF LIFE GAVE YOU AN DESERVING OPPORTUNITY TO BE ARROGANT? WOULD YOU?

Our topic this week is haughty eyes – or pride – or arrogance, you know the drill.

But let me flip it for you a little. What if a situation gave you FULL authority to be proud, to show your authority over another? What would you do then?

The answer lies in this wonderful little video that went viral a couple of months ago – it is about a judge passing a sentence to a man convicted of burglary theft.

As he was about to leave, the judge asked him if he went to a particular school. Immediately he recognised her and broke into uncontrollable sobs. They were classmates in the same school while growing up. One became a convict, another a judge. Imagine this situation.

The thing is, she could have chided him – gloated about where she has reached in life, and where he was, a convicted burglar.

She didn’t.

Rather, she gently told him, “I hope you can change your ways, you were the nicest kid.” Hearing that the man burst into tears, only managing to say, “Oh my goodness…!”

Thanks to this kind and humble judge, there is a good chance that the man will possibly mend his ways and turn to an honest life.

Watch the video – and keep a box of tissues nearby. You will need it.

NO ONE IS BEST BUT ME

The Merriam-Webster dictionary defines ‘haughty‘ as being blatantly or disdainfully proud or which in simple terms mean having or showing the insulting attitude of people who think that they are better, smarter or more important than other people.

No doubt being haughty or rather having haughty eyes is considered to be one among the seven things hated by Lord Almighty. The eyes are the mirror to the heart. It is believed that if one looks into the eyes the mechanisms of the heart could be understood. So it also means, if a person has haughty eyes, the overall attitude of his heart is to look down upon and scorn others.

Now this is something we really don’t want to encounter. Haughtiness or pride is spontaneous and this gives rise to a host of other sins.

What causes a person to be haughty?

Friends, it can be anything one does best or a possession but the biggest thing that triggers haughtiness is a consideration that ‘I am above all’. A haughty person acknowledges less and attributes his blessings, his successes all to himself. A feeling that ‘no one is best but me’ empowers the heart of a haughty person. He or she doesn’t think for a second time to lie, shed innocent blood and spread violence. All this is done only to be at the top.

The scriptures speak about such people who wanted to be at the top. Lucifer, Nimrod, Belshazzar, King Saul were among them. The result of such arrogance is nothing but downfall.

The philosophy behind terrorism is haughtiness. Certain people are proud of the way they profess their love for their religion. Professing love for God without humility is not righteousness.

Haughtiness only leads to downfall as the person is concerned with gathering treasures of the Earth which is passing away.

The real treasure lies in not staying at the top but acknowledging the Most High and in building relationships of a healthy kind with your fellow beings in encouragement and motivation.

Now that’s called making a difference.

SELF-RESPECT IS VITAL BUT EGO IS DANGEROUS

“No matter what you have achieved in life; no matter who you are, if you are arrogant – it all goes down the drain.”

I read this somewhere as a child and it stuck a cord inside me. I understood to the core that there is no reason or excuse to be arrogant – and I never took that path. Rather I went to the other extreme. I was too humble, so much that I allowed people to step over me and use me like a doormat. I was a low confident child who also suffered from being bullied. With time and age I understood the real meaning of ego, arrogance and how it is different from respecting yourself – and this is what I want to write about.

“I can do this job very well” is self-respect and confidence. “Only I can do this job and nobody else is as smart to do it” is arrogance and over-confidence. Self respect says that I should be valued exactly the way I value others and myself. Humility says I will always value others for what they deserve. Humility says that every human being is special and has certain qualities that I can get inspired from. Ego says that I am supreme and nobody else is better than me.

What happens when you don’t respect yourself enough? The world doesn’t respect you either and you get treated like a doormat. What happens when you are arrogant and egotistic? The world doesn’t respect you yet again because you don’t respect the world. The only way to be in harmony with the world is to respect yourself and others. One should be humble enough to say that I love myself and my world; I respect myself and my people; I will take care of myself and people around me; I will continue to find inspirations to be a better person and will inspire others to be better as well; I believe that I am special and so is every other human being.

So, understand the thin line between self respect and ego that we all have to watch out for – where one is vital and other is dangerous.

WHY DON’T YOU JUST FLIP THE COIN?

A coin has two sides. And we always look at the side facing us and not the other.

Its a weird sentence to start with. But though we live in a simple world its our own emotions that complicate everything around. As much as we appear to be sensible and confident there is always that insecurity and vulnerability that is seeded deep within us and we cannot shake it off. It’s a feeling that never goes away. It is this deep rooted feeling that gives birth to our ugly side. The façade that we put on for the world to see. The arrogance, the ego, the pride , the vanity… All to  keep the world at bay, so that nobody peers close enough to look at how utterly lost you.

How unbelievable beat down you feel. The haughty eyes hide the fear underneath that if we show our real self we won’t be accepted for who we are, that we will be mocked and be called weak or naive. So we do the same to everybody around. We mock them, judge them. Because how dare they… how dare they have the guts to do what we failed at…?

So like I said, two sides of the same coin. Two stories of the same person. One arrogant and the other  lost. One proud and the other insecure. One egoistic and the other vulnerable. Simple life but complicated beings.

So food for your thoughts is how much better would it be if we just drop the act… Wouldn’t the world be a better place if we just flip the coin and show what we are really made of…? ‘A Scared bunch of people with a good heart and kind soul…!’

HOW THREE SISTERS LED HUMANITY TO DESTRUCTION?

I want to tell you a story about three sisters and their mother.

Arrogance, Pride & Ego are three very good sisters. And their beloved mother is Selfishness (Self  in short). Ego is the eldest daughter of Selfishness, Pride is second and the third one is Arrogance. Ego & Pride usually initiate and plan things in obedience to their mother Selfishness and Arrogance implements it publicly.  They never care for anybody. They don’t think what people will feel or how their actions can affect others. They only care about themselves and their mother, Self.

These three sisters continued these acts daily to please their mother, Self. They never restrained themselves to do what they wanted to do.

A day came when people started to avoid their mother, Selfishness. She was unable to understand why people were avoiding her and her daughters. She became isolated from all her friends and society. She became all alone. Self was the strength of her three daughters. Thus, they became very feeble and weak along with their mother. 

Finally, a day came when Self was found dead in her own apartment along with her three daughters. They all committed suicide.

What a sad end to the family of Self or Selfishness and her three daughters?

Truly, arrogance, pride and ego have destroyed many people. They have initiated quarrels and wars among families  and nations. They are on the verge of destroying the whole human kind.

There are two Greek forms of the word arrogance used in the Bible. One is Huperogkos means “swelling” or “extravagant” used to describe  “arrogant words.” The second one is Phusiosis, meaning a “puffing up of the soul” or “loftiness, pride.”

Gotquestions.com describes: “Arrogance is nothing more than an overt display of one’s sense of self-importance (2 Timothy 3:2). It is akin to that “it’s all about me” mindset that says, “The world revolves around me” (Proverbs 21:24).” 

Who will accept you when you try to declare that you are everything and everything should go according to you? The answer is known to us: “NOBODY.”

I saw this video on Youtube which made me feel scared. Click the link bellow to have a glance: 

Stay Blessed

HAUGHTINESS OR HUMILITY – WHAT DO YOUR EYES REFLECT?

OUR EYES SPEAK

It is said that – ‘Eyes are the windows to the soul.’ So very true! Our eyes are one of the means via which we communicate non-verbally. They convey even more than our spoken words. Even when a person doesn’t utter a word, the expressions of his / her eyes speak volumes. Through the gestures of our eyes we communicate and also perceive the intents of the communication we receive from others. Eyes not only collect information from the outer world but also convey feelings and emotions. A gaze or a stare, the amount of eye movement, the dilation or expansion of the pupils are effective ways of conveying and perceiving conveyed information. And so, we have the innocent look, the naughty look, the sad look, the mischievous look, the angry look, the seductive look, the dangerous look and so on.

UNDERSTANDING THE HAUGHTY LOOK

This article deals with the ‘haughty look’. To explain simply, ‘haughty’ means ‘arrogant’ – bragging too much about oneself or showing oneself bigger and better than others. Haughtiness is a negative attribute of the heart. A person who is too proud of his / her intellect, wealth, accomplishments, looks, power, etc. is said to be haughty. A haughty person thinks and acts superior and looks down on others. To give examples – making fun of others and speaking in a cocky way when they are not aware of the new brand of mobiles that have been launched makes me haughty. To show off my accomplishments and boast of my degrees to prove that I’m more learned than others makes me haughty. To constantly boast of my looks and beauty in a way that pushes others to be ashamed of theirs makes me haughty. And yes, to show myself as too righteous and spiritual over and above others also makes me haughty!

When we refer to ‘haughty eyes’, we basically refer to pride in the heart which is conveyed through the gestures of our eyes. And so what we are looking at here is essentially an attitude of arrogance. Arrogance does not indicate confidence, as many may want to believe. Rather it is a reflection of insecurity and a fragile self-esteem deep within the individual.

HOW DOES HAUGHTINESS MANIFEST ITSELF?

When a baby is born, he / she perceives the world to be revolving around himself / herself. This is true to a great extent as everyone is fussy about the infant’s arrival. Infants generally outgrow this trait of egocentrism as they increase in age. However, the continual presence of egocentrism even in the adult years is perceived as haughtiness. Haughtiness is a negative character trait.

A haughty spirit emerges from a deep-rooted desire to cover up our shortcomings, to hide our fears, to protect our weaknesses from coming to the limelight by exalting certain other traits in a greater-than-life manner. A haughty spirit finds manifestation in the way we look at others. Have you ever been in a position where someone looked at you from top to bottom and either turned away their faces or gave a nasty expression? This is the work of haughty eyes. You couldn’t really understand the reason behind it, you thought there was nothing wrong about you and you deserved nothing of the sort. Perhaps you were hurt or you ignored the whole episode or decided to pay back to the person at an appropriate time!

REPLACE YOUR HAUGHTY EYES WITH HUMBLE EYES

Just as we would feel belittled by the haughty looks of others, our haughty eyes also have the potential to rob others of their self-esteem. The Bible tells thus – “Let someone else praise you and not your own mouth; an outsider and not your own lips.” When I praise myself and speak too highly of myself, I prepare the ground for a haughty spirit which is further manifested in my haughty looks. Haughty eyes are detestable in the sight of God. Our eyes are meant to express love and compassion for others – to build others and not break them.

Humility in spirit leaves no space for haughty eyes. When we accept our weaknesses with humility, we will rejoice over our strengths with the same humility. We all are designed uniquely and blessed differently. And so, it is for us to appreciate the goodness in others and lift them up.

We need not be like the egocentric infant, wanting to gloss over our own selves all the time. Let our eyes speak the language of a heart that overflows with humility. Eyes loaded with humility have a strange magnetic power in them which attract others, whereas haughty eyes repel. Those who humble themselves will find themselves exalted in due time. That’s the secret of success!

Author’s Bio: Rajnandini Sahu has done her Post Graduation in Clinical and Counselling Psychology and is presently working as a Counsellor in a school, apart from pursuing higher studies. She can be contacted at ‘rsahu1023@gmail.com‘.