I am allergic to Negativity, like seriously! And that is one thing that totally drains me emotionally. I can handle being physically drained, but being emotionally drained is something I cannot manage, the reason being, the outburst and the manifestation of emotional drain is very pathetic and pitiful, at least in my case. I cry, apparently for no good enough reason, I withdraw in my shell and prefer to hibernate. I am always in a sulking mode, followed by heavy head and mood swings. This behavior impacts not just me but my family as well, needless to say, in a negative way. Thus, negativity invites negativity and it traps you in a vicious circle.
It can be very easy to succumb to the negativity. Why, and how, you may ask. Let me tell you. We encounter Negativity every day, everywhere. Below are a few examples.
- Negative thoughts: This is the basic and most common trigger of Negativity. Sometimes our mind just acts like a devil and dwells only on the negativity. At times, we can’t help but think that something bad is going to happen. You cannot live a positive life with a negative mind. It is very important that we train our mind to look at the positive side, it works wonders.
- Negative people: Goodness, you will find plenty of them around you. Negative people are those who keep complaining or cribbing about how things are wrong, how they suffer so much, how bad things only happen to them etc. Trust me such people bring in the epidemic of negativity. And unknowingly, you start thinking like them. I just hate such kind of people. Who doesn’t have problems in life? So why cry and complain? Is it going to solve any of your problems? No, right? Rather invest that energy in clearing the clutter in your mind and focus on solution to improvise your life. There is one more type of negative people – those who start with a NO. For example, if you suggest them something, the first thing that they have to say is “NOT possible”. Why start with a NO? Try at least! These people often fail to understand their own potential. Stay away from Negative people; they have a problem for every solution.
- Negative relationships: Some relationships are meant to bother you. I call a relationship negative if it is the one that you do not want to keep but have to. Like putting up with bitter relatives or the relationship between the husband and wife who cannot stay together but can’t divorce for some reason. This is the toughest trigger to negativity. Just imagine having to be with someone you can’t stand! Every single thing that person says or does pushes you further in the quicksand of negativity.
- Negativity at home: It is said that you can sense the vibes of the place the moment you step there. It is so true! You will be easily able to make out a place or a home which has lot of fights within family. Fights within family is the worst thing that can ever happen, at least in my eyes. I can fight with the world, but not with my family. Continuous fights in family creates a bubble of negativity around the family members and eventually they start hating each other. End result – family breaks, a home breaks!
- Negativity at work: This is very rampant of late. The cut throat competition in the corporate world often results into negativity. It is common to witness the jealous colleagues who hate you for progressing. Note these words, they hate you for progressing, they do not have a problem with the fact that they are not progressing, but they have a huge problem with you stepping on the next rung of the career ladder. Such people spread negativity easily. They elaborately talk about how undeserving you are, how you are the favored one and how you have more ways than your contribution to work to achieve success. Fortunately, such people don’t bother me much, because I stay at one arm’s distance from everybody at work. But yes, this breed is certainly harmful.
- Negativity in media: I am sure you will agree that we are witnessing the era of negative journalism. Every day the newspaper is flooded with negative news of rapes, accidents, abuses, murders, robberies, deaths and scams. Where are all the good news like some remote rural man inventing something big, some satellite reaching a new height, some under privileged student securing high grades in board exams? May be such news occupy a small corner which is left after publishing all the negative news! I just so hate reading newspapers these days. I don’t even remember when was the last time I read one
Above 6 triggers of negativity are something that we witness every day, every hour in one form or the other and it is bound to have a negative impact on you. Thus, it is very easy to succumb to negativity.
Over the years, I have learnt the “Negativity Management”. Here is how I safeguard myself from negativity.
- Prayers & Meditation: Praying to God and meditating everyday works wonders for me. It clears my mind of all the anxiety, stress and insecurity that any or all of the above triggers have had. Consistent prayers and continuous practice of meditation builds an aura around me which acts as a shield and protects me from ill effects of negativity.
- Cut down the interaction with Negative people: The moment I realized that the person I am interacting with is negative I immediately cut down the interaction with him/her. I keep it to the bare minimum. This helps me staying away from them, thus, not attracting the vice of negativity. I have literally walked out of a few friendships for this reason and I do not regret a bit. You may not be able to control someone’s negative behavior but you can control how long you can participate in it.
- Choose what you read: This may sound funny, but I truly avoid reading negative stuff, not just newspapers but also novels and other fictions. I choose reading love stories (with a happy ending) over murder mysteries or other abuse stories. I do this consciously because when I read a book, the characters stay with me for a very long time 😁Hence it is important that I choose good and positive characters which won’t harm me or change my actions for worse even if they dwell on my mind for a long time. Some great inspiring and positive quotes also do wonders to me.
- A coin has two sides: I have this fact clear in my mind. Like a coin has two sides, every difficult situation also has two sides. If one side is difficulty and obstacles, the other side is opportunities and learning. There is always a take away from a negative situation, just that you have to have a right frame of mind and identify the learning.
While the above points can help you to safeguard yourself from the negativity what is important is to build immunity within. And for that, every day, every moment you have to keep reminding yourself that life is good, if there are things to complain, there are more things to be thankful for. Trust in God and surrender yourself to Him. No one can protect you better.
Negativity perpetuates itself, breeds dissatisfaction and clutters the mind. And when the mind is cluttered with negativity happiness is much harder to come by. Negativity is a very nasty and contagious disease. Remove yourself from all the negative people, situations, and things. Choosing to be positive will help you maintain a better attitude, better health and a better mindset. Protect yourself; don’t let negativity drain you emotionally.
How do you handle negative people and negative situations? Does it drain you emotionally? I would love to hear about your experiences and learning.