Embarking on a new journey must be an exciting one, right? How according to you is settling into a new city? Would involve a lot more responsibility, isn’t it? And what about starting a new session, joining a group of completely different people, entering into a new year, or go on a solo trip, etc.? Must be fun enough. Well for me this year it’s all at a time. I didn’t even realize how steadily my school days passed and I entered into my dream college. So obviously, with this new year comes a sense of responsibility, resolutions, planning and ideas, and a lot more than expected.
From the past few days of my life, I am recollecting hundreds of memories of mine just to figure out what went wrong somewhere. Why couldn’t I achieve what I wanted to? Could I be in a better place? Is what am I doing good enough? Shall I be at peace? Will I be happy reminiscing the time and place where I am now? And the list goes on and on. By now, many of you might have understood what my problem is. Yeah, it is ‘overthinking’ indeed.
People who know me well are of the opinion that my face says it all. However, it’s not every time they are right. I’m a very sensitive person actually. I take time to open up and don’t speak much though I am fluent when it comes to writing. I do raise my voice in public whenever in need but beyond that, you would always find me calm. A peace-loving girl I am and not much into social media, group chats, etc. Many of the people who see me upset don’t bother much thinking it’s none of their business, some of them do want to take the initiative but they don’t; thinking I should share it myself and that hardly happens. Only a very few of the people who believe in giving rather than taking dare to ask and help me out with what I’m going through.
And I want to change this habit of mine. I don’t want to seek any empathy from people. Overthinking is what makes the situation worse. Instead of finding a way out of the problem, it pushes you into the well deeper and deeper. You even begin visualizing the things that have not even happened in real. Your focus remains limited to the problem and doesn’t shift to the solution. You don’t feel like doing anything, cry out for no absolute reason and end up hurting yourself, and everyone around you. That’s the reason why you don’t have a group of friends to accompany you in whatever you do and wherever you go and you distant yourself from your family as well. I want to give up on such emotions and habits of mine. I wanna enjoy my life to the fullest, trying out new things, traveling and visiting new places, make good connections with everyone around me, and helping somebody in need.
So in this new year, I have decided to stop watering the dead relations that didn’t stand the test of time. Better to take the next step and let it go. Holding on to something that’s not yours would only hurt your self-esteem. For any problem in life put in your best efforts and never ever think about the results. Believe in yourself, learn to say no, and overcome your fears, meditate, take a deep breath, connect to God, and surrender. And yeah, one more thing to take into consideration is never caring what other people say. Their actions should not affect you.
In Closing, I would also like to share a beautiful quote by Erma Bombeck,
“Worry is like a rocking chair: it gives you something to do but never gets you anywhere.”