WHAT DO I WANT TO LEAVE BEHIND BEFORE 2021 WINKS AT ME?

I used to think accepting or adopting something new or alien is difficult but now I feel that leaving something behind or quitting or getting rid of things is much more difficult. We are aware of the fact that how difficult it is for an addictive person to get rid of his/her addictions. Recently, I was so challenged to quit something that was necessary for my life but it was difficult for me to decide it. 

One thing that you want to leave behind this year in 2020?” I asked this question to 35 or 40 odd relatives and friends of mine and I got the following answers: 

One young girl responded – my makeup products. I know many girls get addicted and busy beautifying themselves but at the end of the day, they feel guilty about spending a lot on it. That was an honest answer. 

Another brother said, “Controlling my tongue. At times, my words are too rude to tolerate“. That is quite a confession. In the time we are in now, we really don’t care what we do, what we say, or how we express ourselves to others. We are so irresponsible about our behaviors but the attempt to leave behind that attitude is truly commendable. I applaud it.   

Another woman said, “The partiality of relationship, gender, and love. My house has a lot of it”.  Sibling rivalry, partiality in the families are very common but these are more prevalent these days so it is a constant struggle for all of us to stay positive and sane in a sinful world and be the change agent we are called for. I think the one who poured it out to me knows that she has to deal with it with love, care, and a lot of responsibilities.  All the best, my sis.

 

It was shocking for me when I heard this from her, “Relationship“. But as she didn’t explain what kind of relationship it is not wise for me to speculate it much. It is true, living in a toxic relationship is a big pain in life these days. I struggle thinking about how to really find a way for people who are going through such problems in their marriages or families. 

 

My niece replied, “A bad habit of complaining.” No, I am not going to say which niece of mine said this. But jokes apart, I know a few people who constantly complain about every other thing or people they come across. Though, my niece expressed all her complaints to God only. I was really happy that she kept it limited only to God because only He can really bring any changes to all the things that worry her or disturb her. But if we have a complaining habit or attitude, it is necessary to get rid of it for our good only.

 

Two people replied with the words like, “None” and “Nothing“. They are probably happy with whatever is happening within and around them or they are ready to accept everything that comes in their ways depending on God’s divine strength.  

 

Another niece responded and said, “Maybe I could be a little less lazy I guess…, and by that I mean a little less sleeping.” So she wants to leave behind her excessive sleeping disorder ( it is just her habit though). That is like leaving behind a blessing in today’s context. I struggle to sleep for long hours these days because of stress and Netflix. See, I was honest. 😛

All the best sweetheart, try hard not to be lazy and sleep a little lesser.  

 

One of my oldest friends who is lean and thin replied, “I want to avoid sweets as I have put on weight… But I know I can not.” I joked when I read her answer and she wanted to prove that she has really put on weight recently. But she also confessed that she can’t leave behind that habit of having sweets. It is good for her not to leave it behind. 🙂

 

One of my eldest sisters whom I respect a lot said, “Indisciplined schedule.” That was shocking again from a person like her. But I had asked to be honest so she did and that is commendable. I have always struggled in this area of having a disciplined and organized way of living, rather than following a very laid-back lifestyle. 

 

Another buddy replied, “My loneliness… Want to move in with my hubby…“. I feel for her. Sometimes our professional requirements and adjustments of today’s world ask a big cost to pay in life. So if she is thinking of leaving behind this lifestyle and live together with her spouse then it will be the best thing that can happen in 2021 for them. Please do consider it and be successful in leaving it behind in the coming year, Buddy. 

 

A co-writer and close friend says, “The worst me… I want to leave and get a better me.” A good attempt but it is very difficult to act upon something which is not specific but very broad.  

 

One of my sisters-in-law says, “Bad sleeping habit😬.” Stop watching Netflix and Prime. That much I can say to her… 😛 But yeah, on a serious note, having a good night’s sleep really helps to take most of the wisest decisions.   

 

One of my (adaptive 🙂 ) sisters said, “The tension and constant struggle I have with my Mother in Law.” I can understand how bad it can be when there are constant struggles between the two most important members of a family. They were supposed to be making a house HOME and the struggles between them are difficult to create that atmosphere in the family. If one of them is quiet and tolerating just for the sake of peace in the family then how painful it will be for her to go through it. I can’t really imagine. She had shared her heart with me before and I feel for her. But it is a tough thing to get rid of. Take care sis, and think well before acting on it.

 

I am an overthinker and a control freak…. this year has been especially bad on this front… if I could I would love to dial back on this anxiety of mine.” I love you, my sis for such an honest response to my query. I quite relate to this too and I believe most of us struggle with this attitude. 

Even another sweetest girl says, “For me, it’s overthinking.” Thinking is really good, but overthinking is useless and sucks a lot of our energy. So it is a good decision to get rid of it before stepping into a new year. 

 

Taking things and people for granted is the worst thing and habit. Because taking for granted is kind of misjudging or miscalculating things or people which is really dangerous. One of my co-writers replied honestly, “I want to leave behind my habit of taking things for granted at times.” Good job girl, fight it out and get rid of it. 

 

During this pandemic time, many suffered financially and there were many suicide cases. But those who stayed strong holding onto their grounds are to be applauded and worthy of everyone’s praises.  One of my closest friends writes back, “The stress of not having financial security for my family…“. You can fight it out, buddy. Do get rid of this and you will be victorious. 

Another close friend writes, “I want to leave procrastination and self-pity.” Oh, let me tell you, my friend, we all relate to this. Postponing is so fun but I really want to get rid of it myself as well. 😛

The last response was – “The original answer is a few family members… But the real answer is my bitterness… I became too bitter this year…I don’t like this version of me…I wanna go back to being the sweet, gullible ignorant fool. I was much happier that way… Now it feels like I have no well-wishers. Like everyone is there for a selfish purpose. It was easier when I only saw things at face value and didn’t judge people. But some people’s true faces made me lose all my trust. I actually mourn for old me.” Someone very close to my heart responded to me when I asked her the question. She has been struggling a lot in her life. She has talents that people can only dream of but her present state of mind worries her as well as worries me. And I will be praying unceasingly as she tries her best to get rid of her present self and get back to her old good self. 

Ending my long compilation of what different people want to leave behind or get rid of, I want to share my One Thing that I want to leave behind before moving forward in the new year 2021. Only two people dared to ask me back, “What is that you want to leave behind”

I really want to leave behind my dependency on people instead of doing things on my own depending on my God, the sustainer of my life. Let me give you the lowliest example of my dependency on people… During this lockdown period when I was unable to go anywhere, was secluded from all, and suffered because of my health conditions for months, I literally looked for people to talk to or chat with me. And I hated the feeling of being denied of their availability to entertain me. I am good at creating things for my own entertainment but instead of working on them, I was too laid back to rely on people. I truly, want to get rid of that attitude and move into the new year with my God-given creativity and full dependency on my Saviour. 

In the end, I can quote a Bible verse and hold onto the same –

“But one thing I do: forgetting what lies behind and reaching forward to what lies ahead, I press on toward the goal…”

I will press on towards my goal, leaving behind my dependency on people as you all will be trying your best to leave behind what you wanted to. 

Stay Blessed!