A few years back, one of my very close friends revealed that she used to like me a lot and even have feelings for me presently (the time she revealed her feelings). But it was also true that she was happily married to her husband for years together. She could reveal her heart because she was clean in her heart and confirmed her dedication and love for her husband. But she went on to ask me a question that made me ponder on it, seeking an answer to that question.
“Why God gives that feeling of love in our hearts for someone very special but doesn’t give the scope to culminate it?”
And I quite relate to that question as I have come across many beautiful relationships where I’ve felt to be drifting away though I have managed myself to get back to be on the track. But this question still slithers in my mind and heart even today without having a proper answer to it. In fact, whenever I try to search a proper answer to that question it lets my mind raises more questions in my mind:
Are connections bad? Probably, I will outnumber everyone in having connections with so many…
Is it better to avoid making friends? I have never learnt avoiding or ignoring any human who interests me or who extends a hand towards me.
Are emotions supposed to be suppressed? I am so outright honest with my feelings that I haven’t learnt the skills to suppress my feelings at all.
Is it good, pretending everything to be alright? Not at all, I really can’t pretend and be alright.
And the last question is a deadly one…
Is drawing a line necessary? Absolutely!
Relationships are so beautiful that we build with people irrespective of their genders. But ironically, it is absolutely necessary for us to draw a line when we are supposed to. I would like to confess, sometimes I hate to draw a line with someone I love so much. But I just force myself to do so… 😦
Why is it necessary? Why I do not have the scope or freedom to express my love for just anyone irrespective of their statuses (of whatever kind)? WHY???
I will give you a mental picture which might help you to understand why is it necessary to draw a line in relationships…
When we take a walk in the woods, or roads, or a field we find many beautiful flowers across the path blooming and smiling at us. They grow erratically with freedom. They look good, no doubt about it but they succumb to their end without proper care and attention because they are stray, far from a caretaker. Usually, those who walk across them, pluck them or uproot them from the source of their life and nourishment.
Whereas, if we look at the flowers in a garden, they bloom with pride and were well taken care of by someone who is attentive to them, not necessarily an able gardener or farmer.
Relationships that we make are like those beautiful flowers blooming with different colours and beauty. But they all look beautiful, protected and safe within a boundary drawn with godly standards.
The Bible says,
“Better a patient person than a warrior, one with self-control than one who takes a city.”
And a person with self-control draws a line and creates a beautiful garden.
How about bringing those wild flowers into the garden within a boundary? They will look beautiful within those lines as well.
Actually, our fallen nature makes things complicated. And God, probably doesn’t allow us to be disorderly and stray because He knows, the more we are allowed, the more perverse we will be in our behaviour and life. Why can’t we be of a clean mind, and keep beautiful friendships all around?
Friends! Let’s enjoy the relationships that we make within a permissive line drawn for the safety and lasting of those relationships.