“Oh boy, do not cry, you are a shame to the boys“
“Being boy you are crying, shame on you“
“Be a boy, Don’t cry like a girl“
“You are a boy, don’t crib“
We all must have heard such comments that are prevailing in the society.
Don’t you think that it is the harsh treatment we do to boys?
Girls get umpteen chances to weep a lot. If you look at the TV soap serials, there are enough ones to justify my statement. Interestingly, the market utilizes the fact that women cry and men don’t cry.
In reality, Men do cry. And actually, I want to refurbish that statement- Real Men cry.
Crying is signified as a sign of weakness. But it is not right. Women cry but they are never weak. Crying is one way, our body expels the pressure that we give to the mind. A perfect cry can make even the roaring mind calm.
Over the years, we have taught the boys not to cry, as it is bad for them to do it. doing it, we have overburdened their emotions and not allowed them to expel in the right way. As they grow up, these frustrations and negative emotions build up and finally, they begin to be harsher. It not only ruins them but also the people around.
Instead, when we let them cry, their mind do not get burdened and they are able to cope with the changes.
Let us break the myth that -“to emote is to be weak“.
Sometimes I keep wondering who gets hurt when a boy cries? Does it ache them so much while crying?
As moms, when we raise a child, be it a girl or a boy, raise it like they are a whole human being rather than segregate emotions like for boy and girl. Encourage even the boys or girls to share or expel their emotions, it is not the sign of weakness. It is important to teach them, why it is essential to express what they feel.
Have you seen a toddler go crankier and crazier when they try to express some emotions and they do not know how to go about it? Anger is one such emotion, that derives from subsequent bottling up of emotions. This, in turn, makes men more abusive and starts beating up the people around them.
Many doctors have stated that suppressing emotions especially crying, is bad in many ways to men or even women. Depression and anxiety are something we have to look forward for in such cases.
Want to raise good human beings – forget the gender bias. Learn to garner such insights that make the boys or even girls understand and analyze the mystery of crying. Teach them to open up their emotions in the right way rather than suppress them.
Cry, when you need to cry. Tears have no gender bias, they just flow down, even if you have a beard or not.