“I AM NOT HUNGRY IF YOU ARE GOING TO COOK”

I am from that population of Indian middle class women/ girls, who were/are never allowed/forced/asked/ had to enter kitchen before their alliance was fixed.  Studies were of paramount importance in my life then.  So distanced I was from kitchen even in a single room house that I was capable of burning even water if I was asked to boil it (I request you to not to take it too literally 😁).

The crux is I was miserable when it was about cooking. From choosing the wrong ingredient to choosing wrong technique, from overcooking to undercooking, I have been there done that all. If a person can overload something as simple and basic as instant noodles with salt you can imagine her expertise in spoiling the food and taste. Yes, that was me.

One instance from my “cookbook” (since it’s mine I can serve only incidents which are luckily not accidents and not recipes)  that I would remember till my memory power is intact and would like to share with you all on this page.

That was in the year 2004, I went to my friend’s place and was very hungry. I told her the same.  Within no time she rolled out flat bread (roti) for me and served along with a curry (a combination of a lentil and bottle-guard, a kind of vegetable). It was very delicious and pacified my hunger.  I was in awe of her culinary skills. So inspired she left me that I have decided to wear an apron and enter the kitchen.  Requested recipe and with head full of imaginations that I would dish out something sumptuous and receive praises from my family I reached my house.

It was Sunday, I announced that a delicious meal is on its way, I am going to cook today. Mom gave her consent and I debuted in kitchen.  Got the spices right, chopping done and everything gone into the process.  And I started off with flat breads. Aroma of spices soon engulfed the house.  I was so happy that I am on right track.

Before I could submerge myself into that feeling my flat breads started turning out to be burnt (not every single piece, but only a majority of them😂). I said to myself “it happens in trials” and turned to my curry and opened the lid. Appearance seemed so-so, not very pleasing. “Okay let everyone taste it first, sometimes appearance may be misleading” this is how I assured myself that everything will be fine.

As everyone was hungry I had to hurry up serving them. And my eyes were fixed on their faces to catch their unadulterated reaction to what went through their tongues to stomach. 😥😫 These emojis might explain you their plight then. The lentil was undercooked and spices almost left them with upset stomachs. Horrible is the word to be precise.

My brother, typical he is started pulling my leg. In fact he was right when he said “In which part of the world is this called FOOD? Thanks for making us fast dear” and left my parents in splits and made me frown. My father was more encouraging and said “Keep on trying, it’s just the beginning”.

That surely lifted my spirit and I requested for one more chance and wanted to try a new dish in the evening. Everyone, especially my brother was taken aback and turned to my father and said “Please save us from going to bed in hunger, please cook something that has your signature (my father was a great cook)”.

When I insisted on being given a chance my brother declared “I am not hungry if you are going to cook”😔.

That day gave me a lesson for life “Don’t try to sprint before learning to walk or else be ready to fall flat on face”

I could have started with little help in kitchen rather than taking a huge leap of cooking an entire meal that day😀.

Do share your kitchen experiences/nightmares, whatever they are. I am all ears 😀.

12 thoughts on ““I AM NOT HUNGRY IF YOU ARE GOING TO COOK”

  1. Your Dad is a good cook and gave the best advice on earth. That’s alright, I’d tell your younger self. We all trip, knocked my life, make mistakes but learn. Kitchen is like rocket science to me and except frying an egg or heating food, I don’t know anything. Yeah. I am fine with chai and coffee 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Hahaha, so true this reminds me of an incident. I know basic cooking that includes making dosa , roti ( don’t ask me about shapes). Soon after marriage when I loving tossed a question “what would you like you eat ? ” Expecting a ‘known receipe’ or YouTube- able. I heard his liking for brinjal and egg and that shut all my enthusiasm. Because I never prepared this recipe bfre and that wasn’t available in YouTube. Pulling all my efforts I tried frying brinjal and adding eggs at the end. Curry looked almost ok with those coriander dressing ( yes, covered by greens look good ). As soon as I opened to serve my husband started trolling back and forth laughing and explained it was two dish and not one ;). We had good laugh.

    🙂

    Liked by 2 people

  3. This is so hilariously described that it makes completely it relatable to me!
    Once when my parents were out of town, despite of the maid being there,I happily took the initiative to make sandwiches for my brothers and so it ended it up all disastrously as it happened in your case.I ended up adding half boiled potatoes and pepper seeds instead of mustard ones.The worst part is I didn’t tasted it thinking my brothers would be the first one to taste the delicious breakfast.However my brothers refused to eat it (without telling the reason as they didn’t wanted to hurt me) and I thought that they were being fussy so I literally forced them to eat.Only when they left for the school and I tasted it,that I literally felt sorry for my brothers and thanked God for giving me such wonderful brothers who actually gulped in without a word,though grumbling a bit!

    Liked by 1 person

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