“My wife is doing good, we are very much ready to welcome our baby. Her expected date is three weeks away, I feel so tensed, don’t know how I am going to handle it… Boy or girl we are excited about the baby around which our world is going to revolve. However, I confess that having a baby girl would make me more concerned. I would really feel pressure to bring up a baby girl. Our surroundings are not safe, creches, schools, colleges, offices, not a single place makes me feel any less worried… I don’t know if I can be a responsible dad who can protect my little girl as a parent. It really does worry me….” – view point of my friend who was expecting his first child.
Well, I wouldn’t say I am surprised, I would have to give it a thought. I laid back on the couch after this conversation pondering over how I would have felt. I always am biased towards a girl child, I would just love having one. If I were to be expecting a girl, would I be more concerned than having a boy, without a doubt, the answer is “YES”. Times have changed, girls now get to study whatever they love to, can work, they grow up to be financially independent which really makes a difference to the way life is laid out before them, but the real question is, “Is it safe ?”, no-brainer, it’s “NO”.
I do commute to my work place alone. Most of the times when I drive back home it’s already late in the evening. Let me share what happens every day. I get a call everyday at a designated time from my parents, if I do not answer the call, they know I am still at work, my responsibility is to call them back after I am home, no matter how late it is in the night.
Once, it so happened that I wasn’t keeping well, I came home a little early, unknowingly I fell asleep. My parents tried to reach me, I didn’t even have a clue of it because my mobile phone was on silent, the next day morning I see twelve missed calls spaced in time all over the night, couple of messages, when I called them back, I heard what my dad had to say, “Where were you all night ? Do you even have an idea of what kind of thoughts hovered our minds ? This is the last time, you better call us every day after you reach home. Your call is not going to disturb us, frankly, I couldn’t sleep whole night”. This is the reality which every parent, husband, sibling go through everyday, in every home, it can be a boy or a girl, they would be concerned, more so for a girl.
I must accept that I really don’t feel safe when I am driving alone once it’s dark, well, sometimes even when it is day time. I have to be more watchful of the surroundings, every movement feels suspicious, and yes the recent increase in the trends of rapes, molestation’s, acid attacks only increased the amount of data that get’s processed in my brain when I do not have a companion. It’s unsafe !!!
If such is the situation with grown-up’s, imagine about toddlers, young girls. Instances where few month old babies are falling victims of rape, I fail to understand where are we heading. My blood boils, at that moment I cannot really hold on to my anger, how , how on earth can a fully grown up man thinks that a 3-month old girl can satisfy his senseless arousal ? 11 -month old raped for two hours, what the hell ? Wasn’t the baby crying out of pain for two hours and the man had no consideration of it ?
Why do we make the world so unsafe for girls to live ? What was their fault ? Everyone cribs the world has to change, we make the world and are integral part of it, unless our mindsets change the world would never change. That’s far away, I understand but what can be done now?
Fear creeps in , in various forms. Let’s not have that fear subdue our emotions towards having a lovely baby girl. A child is precious, whether it is boy or a girl. If you have a baby girl, I would not suggest to scare your little one by exposing her to all the bad things that happen in the world, but please prepare her to face the adversities. Make her strong, strong enough to understand that the world isn’t safe, strong enough to fight, smart enough to report any misbehavior. As long as we tolerate, the world would make us suffer, let’s fight instead …