“It was an amateur me
A spontaneous moment
wherein I lost all the integrity
The lessons I read but never implemented
a moment of childishness
a moment of anger
that exploded in me
It was quick but left an impact on many
I never turned back to look what was the impact
but the effect stayed along in me as I walked away
for a moment it was relieving
for a moment it was clouding my thoughts
unable to throw me out of my dilemma
I ran away from the emotions
I closed my eyes, to read my heart
yet it was deceiving me too.”
If I could recall a moment of emotional me, it would be the last job I worked on. It was not a decision I made, but the “emotional me” let me decide that I do not want to be crunched under those political feets. I was drained emotionally, unable to think and every effort I took was not getting noticed. In a way, it was draining me. I knew being emotional in a corporate world was not a right choice.
Bein born to get attached to people and things was the only defect I had. I knew I had the least survival chances in the corporate world, as I never knew how to be swim across the current. The only solution was to bid goodbye to my job and leave myself in an isolation. Yet, the decision was strong enough for me. It brought in a positive aspect of life into me. Though initially, it was an untamed emotion, gradually it became an asset to me, to decide and understand the world. The emotional step changed my life as a whole, yet I was happy.
Being a mother, changed the whole perspective of emotions in me. My heart seemed to be much more vulnerable when am a mother. A heart that yearns to be with the child always. I realised motherhood is the weakest emotion that let you carry away, yet the strongest of all. I realised that emotions are my strength – the power of love, anger, gratitude, sadness everything in a mixed form – that is what I am. I am proud of it now.
“As I look at you
The only feeling that accumulates
is the feeling of love
emotions became my strength
emotions let me feel you the most
As you arrived in my life
there was a reason that my eyes watered
It was the strongest feeling that aroused in me
the feeling of being a mom
you drive my emotions crazy
yet you are my life
you are my weakness
you are my strength
there is nothing more joyful than being a mom“
Being a mother, I enjoy the roller coaster ride of emotions.
To quote :
“Your intellect may be confused, but your emotions will never lie to you.”
Yes, emotions are our inner strengths undefined. An asset to us, which helps our unconscious mind lead us to the right path. Driven by emotions at times might lead you into troubles, yet every step in life is a lesson. A lesson to be learned, a lesson to be cherished.