marriageThe above quote really made me laugh. Marriage or a relationship is definitely not a bed of roses, but, I am sure it’s not a battle field either. When a relationship is new we are in seventh heaven and look at the world around us with rose tinted glasses. We try to match up to each other’s expectations. We spend time with each other and try to understand the other person. That is when life looks like a bed of roses.

But a few years down the line when routine sets in and outside factors come in, life slowly turns into a battle field.

Have you ever realised that whatever our frustrations are they usually come out on our spouses only. They seem to become the punching bag for all our vexations. The husband gets bypassed for promotion he comes home very upset and a slightest irritation or excuse at home gets him to blow his fuse. The wife has some squabbles with her in laws and she is so full of it that the moment she is alone with her husband she pores out her woes. The child is not keeping well and parents have not slept through the night taking care of the baby and in the morning in the irritable state the parents are fighting over the fact that whose carelessness was responsible for the baby falling ill in the first place. Or maybe who cares for the baby more. Work pressure, boss issues, children even maid issues anything could trigger the battles.

By the time a little grey starts showing in our hair and our marriage is around a decade old we all would have faced some of these situations. If you haven’t then you are the ideal couple and I would really like to know you and get a few tips from you 😉

For the rest of us I guess in the long term the gift which we can give our spouses is the gift of patience.


Patience to see through the irritated demeanour of my husband and realise the true reason for his anger. Even when he makes me angry unintentionally. Patience to get through the tantrum of my toddler in the middle of the mall. Patience to understand the teenage angst of my 13 year old.  Patience to understand the insecurities of my in laws … I would think before I speak and give the other person some space to vent out his or her frustrations. Basically I would like to gift my loved ones my effort to try and understand them, not to judge them before giving them a patient thought. That’s my gift to you, my patience, it might not be infinite but I would definitely try…