ASL, PLEASE?

Her: Hi
Him: Hey There
Her: ASL, please?
Him: How are you doing?
Her: Is that your ASL?
Him: NO, but age is just a number
Her: Well, I am 27, I am from Delhi
Him: WOW, a Delhi girl, today is my lucky day
Her: You a flirt?
Him: No, just an average man, 28/US. But I was a Delhite too once
Her: Oh, were you? I am a dancer
Him: Gawd, Can this day get any better?
Her: Yes, if you are a Guitarist
Him: You never know, I could be
Her: LOL, are you? Seriously ?
Him: Nah, I can’t even hold one correctly, though I tried, sincerely
Her: You know, I know that feeling, I worked hard to learn Piano, but no luck
Him: I have a feeling we can be good friends….
Her: I have that feeling too…..’

This is how it starts every time. Two people are meeting, finding sync and becoming friends. It all seems unlikely to people who can’t relate to a relationship named or unnamed made virtually.

I was living a life of completeness darkness in January 2016. All hope and positivity had eluded me for long enough to leave me completely devoid of optimism. And on the verge of a psychotic break when I decided I need to talk and to vent. I needed to interact with people. Enough of PC games and enough of bots. And in March 2016, disgusted with life and lonelier than I have ever felt I went to the chat room.

Simply_Me was my id cause I didn’t know what will better define me at that moment. And requests started to pour in. I chatted with many Tom, Dick and Harry. But I was not able to find what I was looking for, a friend, a real friend in that virtual world. And then one day I got a message from a Peace_Lover. He was interesting. He told his name was Rahul, I told him, yeah, sure, every other boy is Raj and Rahul thanks to SRK. His name was genuinely Rahul, and he became my best friend.

He and I haven’t met till date, 31st is his birthday. But he is such a patient listener; I told him all about me, A to Z, thought the name I gave him was not my real name, reason being chat sites tell you to keep your personal details to yourself, especially if you are a girl; Later I was so afraid to lose his friendship that I never told him my real name, but now he knows. And never once he complained. He accepted me as I am. I never thought that I would find someone so special online. I don’t know if I helped him in any way or not, but he helped me loads, and I am no more lonely cause we talk daily, be it just for few minutes.

We don’t know who sits behind those screens, is he good or bad, boy or girl. But I believe that behind that screen is a heart, a mind, a human being who wants to connect. I know that virtual friends and virtual relationships are hardly a lifetime thing, or sometimes they even turn out to be a disaster, but I also know that in real too all friends are not meant to stay forever and heartbreaks and mishaps are waiting to happen between real time friends as well.

You must have heard that money and materialism spoils all things good. That is one more thing that makes virtual friends real special. I know that my virtual friend and I won’t be exchanging any gifts or letting financial status stand in between us. It brings peace to be able to chat with someone on the same lines, all that matters when you chat is the rapport you share.

Today I have numerous virtual friends, and a handful of them are real close to my heart. A couple of them have changed my life 180 degrees with timely emotional and psychological support. I think I would have made a huge mistake if I had not let them come near me owing to the prejudice that having virtual friends isn’t a healthy practice and can hamper my growth in real or bring me harm.

When I can fall in love with Ben Affleck, someone I have seen just on screen, never talked and never interacted with, when I can be awed by Khaled Hosseini, a writer I never even saw, but just admired his works, when I can have love for an RJ, just cause he makes such good pep talk in his deep voice then I think it is so much more obvious to be friends with someone online, someone I never saw or heard or met. But rather someone I felt and knew could feel me and all that is going on my mind.

Image result for virtual friendHaving virtual friends is a blessing for people like me who are introverts and find themselves looking for lonely corners at parties and feel dumbstruck when they need to strike a conversation. But while I am chatting, I feel like the most open and outspoken person, the obscurity helps me come out of my shell and spread my wings. I don’t like to call my online friends as my virtual friends, especially once I exchange numbers with them. They are as real to me as my school friend is. They are not a figment of my imagination written in binary codes of 0 and 1. They aren’t an OS, they are blood, and bones and flesh too. I am proud that I made some very true friendships in a very fake and unstable world. I love them, and they love me back.

There are many pros and cons to such bonds, one of them is the perception of time. While in real friendships grow slow and nurture slow, in virtuality time moves many times faster. If I am friends with you for the past one month, I am your good friend, if it’s been two months, we are thick as thieves, if three, we have been friends a long time, if four, we are friends since forever. Cross the six months barrier, and you are entitled to call yourself a lifetime friend. And this is the very reason that most online endeavours are short lived. One more drawback is I need to be real sensitive, I have to just close my eyes and feel your hugs, your smiles, your laughs and your tears through the emoticons you send. This at times leads to a misunderstanding as out radar can’t always catch your mood. The one that really kicks me is, you can’t send FOOD. Lol…

That green light that blinks next to my friend’s name when he is online brings an instant smile to my face, and I know that now I will be talking to him and exchanging my happy and sad moments with him and he will listen and even thought he might not be able to help me in any way, he will always tell me “I am here for you.”

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21 Comments Add yours

  1. NGonzalez65 says:

    Love this! I can relate to many points you have made here. And, like you, have made some very good and loving friends. Present company included. 😁

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Sakhi says:

      Thank you so much Mrs Gonzalez. 😊 I am glad to know you liked it. Virtual isn’t bad, it’s just a new dimension, a portal that opens in the window of our screens but can teleport us to far away corners of the world in search of that one true friend. Just like you are from US n I am from India, but somehow I never felt far from you. Hugs 🤗 Keep Smiling and Happy Blogging 🙏🌹

      Like

  2. Kuljeet Saini says:

    A very refreshing point of view sakhi.. generally we get to hear only about the pit falls of making friends online.

    Well written..

    Liked by 3 people

    1. Sakhi says:

      Thank you Kuljeet ma’am, each coin has two sides, it’s just our POV that makes us see any one at any given time. I am glad I could make you see it with my perception. Hugs 🤗🌹🙏

      Like

  3. DewDandelion says:

    Excellent and belated birthday wishes to your friend from my side as well. I know how much you value your friends and even a few minutes talk with people like you makes the day pleasant. Keep writing.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Sakhi says:

      Thank you so much Sri, you can see his comment right below your comment so I hope your wishes have reached him already but I will sure give them to him. It’s not just me, but many here value online friends just like real, and yes, a few minutes with them makes our day a lil brighter, a lil happier. Keep Smiling 😊🌹🤘🏻

      Liked by 1 person

  4. Rahul Gupta says:

    Well, I am sure I am unheard of in this community of folks called bloggers.
    So, let me add meaning to my post by claiming with all my honesty that this chap called peace_lover who is quoted in the amazing writing by shubh(Sakshi) happens to be me.
    Coming to the post, I felt a bit nostalgic and was traversing last year’s April when this soul named peace_lover bumped into this beautiful women called Sakshi.
    I always fall short of adjectives when replying to sakhi’s post and this one is no different. And like every other writing, this one too touched my soul!!
    Thank you shubh!

    Liked by 3 people

    1. Sakhi says:

      Hey RG, what a name I gave you, it was all cause yahoo flashed your name as RG. But now these two letters mean so much to me. They mean compassion and they mean understanding. I am glad you bumped into me, or life wouldn’t had been so pretty. Many times you have made me realise that just take things in your stride, “this too shall pass”. I am glad I could enter your fort and pull down some walls. I myself feel nostalgic to think of those tough times but we met in March n not April. 😊 And yes, I will always look forward to our shirt but meaningful chats. As for all the nice words and praise you gave me, I am grateful to you. Thank you so much RG, it was a small tribute from me to our friendship and a small bday gift since I can’t give you anything materialistic. Hugs dear, always keep smiling 🌹✌🏻️🤘🏻😋

      Like

  5. Avinash Das says:

    Great article my virtual friend #Saakshi
    My everyday world is mostly like your’s. Yes…i have many great virtual friends.

    Liked by 3 people

    1. Sakhi says:

      Thank you so much Avinash. You had to have virtual friends, after all we are the two brats, some traits should match. Jokes apart, I am happy to know that you have friends. 😊👌🏻🌹always keep smiling my dear.

      Like

      1. Avinash Das says:

        You are right my brat.
        Your every text always brings smile to my face and trust the same happens with every other person.
        You’re a blessing… keep going, keep smiling too!

        Liked by 1 person

  6. Sakhi says:

    Reblogged this on Quill & Parchment.

    Like

  7. M.Gin says:

    Reblogged this on Wanderlust and commented:

    I can relate to this. In ways I never actually knew until she explained what it meant to her (her virtual friends).
    Virtual reality, is reality too.
    Not the one we would have hoped, but for some, it is as real as whatever is in front of you right now!
    I hope you have fun reading this, my friends!

    Liked by 3 people

    1. Sakhi says:

      Thank you for the reblog my friend. I am exalted to know that I could explain virtual friebdship to you. I am sure that just like me they make your life a lil more special and your heart a lil more warmer. They can’t beat real friends just like you said, but they are as real as the friends we can touch. They have a heart, a mind, they have feelings just as sensitive and complex as any. Keep Smiling and Happy Blogging 😊🌹🙏

      Like

  8. Very touching, so sweet. No food is the bad, but sharing thoughts is fulfilling. 😊

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Sakhi says:

      Thank you dear, glad you liked it. Yes, no food isn’t no sharing, we keep sending each other feelers of the food and the menu and the cuisine and I click so many of my food and share, so the basic want to share is acquired somehow.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. That’s very true. We can share food recipes, thoughts, and how we enjoy this blessing with friends and family. Wonderful point!

        Liked by 1 person

  9. aditi0512 says:

    . ..Every relationship need time and understanding ☺ well written sakhi

    Liked by 3 people

    1. Sakhi says:

      Thank you so much dear. Keep Smiling and Happy Blogging 😊 🌹 🙏

      Liked by 1 person

  10. kjennings952 says:

    I have enjoyed many of your posts. Your authentic voice is evident, even if just “virtual”. I can relate very much to the challenge of being an introvert in a Facebook world and wholeheartedly agree that blogging has allowed me to meet like-minded friends all over the world. Thank you for sharing your story!

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Sakhi says:

      Ohhh, how wonderful it is to hear such a compliment from a fellow blogger. I am trying my best to voice my opinions and will keep doing so, hope I will not let you down. As for what you said about virtual and FB, I share your feelings like a mirror image. Thank you so much dear for taking out time to read and comment. 🙏😊🤘🏻🌹

      Liked by 1 person

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