CHOOSE RIGHT PEOPLE AS “FRIENDS”

As a child, I was always shy and introvert and had very limited friends, but as I grew up my attitude changed and so did the number of my friends. And I took friendship a little too seriously. For me, “friendship means standing up for the person and being self with that person”. This definition also evolved after so many relationships with so many different friends. Of course, it has been a roller coaster ride. Some friends were meant to be for a lifetime, whereas others were meant to be just for a few days. With some friends the relationship grew bitter and with a few others it has only become better.

In last one year, my attitude towards friendship has become quite negative. From a person who was an open book, sharing every little detail of my life with others; I have now become very cautious of how I open my mouth in front of others. From a party person, who would always be jumping around calling people out for parties; I now want to be silent observer at any party. Maybe it’s the age factor that has caused this change, but more than that it is the hurt and emotional turmoil that I have gone through because of some people who I considered my friends. Yes, some of my friends (ex-friends) have backstabbed me so bad that the whole concept of friendship has changed in my heart.

I have thought a lot about what happened and why it happened. There are a million reasons and when I start thinking about it, there is absolutely no end to it. So, I want to put an end to it – I want to forgive them and move on. Is it easy? No, it is not.

Friends are indeed the most important people of one’s life, because they teach you much more about life than anybody else does. They also stand by you and help you out in every situation possible; they do this because they know you will do this for them too. But not every person is the same and so not every friend is the same. So, learn to understand people and make friends with like-minded people. Make friends with people you will never have ego issues with. Make friends with people who will never go behind your back to talk ill of you or even worse backstab you. And if they do, stand up for yourself and with respect walk out of their lives; because there are a lot of people in the world who deserve to be your friend.

I am not saying that end the relationship at the first instance of misunderstanding; all I am saying is that if you are not compatible with your friend, do not put up with them just because they are friends. Do not let your self-respect go down the drain because you have been with a wrong set of people.

On this day, when everybody is so busy sending sweet little messages to their friends on whatsapp and when all the whatsapp groups and facebook pages are flooded with cute messages about how friends are most important part of life; I want to forgive my friends who had hurt me so much and I choose to make them a past. I am making this promise to myself that I will not have any negative feelings towards them and move on with my life meeting new people and making new friends.

On this day, reconsider your friends. Do they inspire you to be your best? Do they guide you when you need support? Do they understand your feelings and provide emotional support to you? Do they help you in any possible way? Do they consider you a priority in their lives? Are they your friends or is somebody just using you in the name of friendship?

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